I especially love that my mood is lifted almost immediately after I begin to dance. I have prayed for the clearing of my mind before but it's hardly long at all before I let everything go and surrender to the music! It's amazing and it makes me so happy. I hope everyone can find an outlet as justifying and uplifting as this is to me and I praise God for this blessing on my life!! God is good.
1.13.2008
blue bella at ciao bella
I especially love that my mood is lifted almost immediately after I begin to dance. I have prayed for the clearing of my mind before but it's hardly long at all before I let everything go and surrender to the music! It's amazing and it makes me so happy. I hope everyone can find an outlet as justifying and uplifting as this is to me and I praise God for this blessing on my life!! God is good.
1.12.2008
not alone and not single
Waiting, originally uploaded by Pink Lemonade <3.But most of all, I don't need a man to be able to live a God-centered life and I don't need him to be encouraged to rise above the obstacles I encounter from day to day. I also don't need a man to be my sole comfort... I have family, sisters, friends, and a God who is alive and moving in my life.
So this is my thank you and my love letter to all of the amazing people in my life! My gratitude and admiration is overflowing for all of you... For putting up with all of my crazy antics and the crazy things in my life!! I love you all very very very much!
Difficult moments, seek God.
Quiet moment, worship God.
Painful moments, trust God.
Every moment, thank God!!
1.11.2008
i've got the blues, baby
chris randell wannabees, originally uploaded by ohtoberich. I'm stoked for all of the dancing tonight!
I'm performing Hip Hop for the Fripple Awards,
I may or may not be accepting an award for dancing at Frippleville,
and then I'm off to blues dance at Ciao Bella!!
It's okay if you're not excited because I AM!!!
1.10.2008
ba da ba ba ba, i'm lovin' it
Just dancing, originally uploaded by perkyNbLue.ANYways... I'm totally looking forward to swing dancing again tonight! I will be having dinner with the fam (Taco Salad, woo!), and from there I will be rushing off to La Jolla. I am just glad that I have the time for it again and I hope that I get into better shape, so I can keep up and get better! This is the year... I hope.
Ch-ch-ch-changes.
I'm just trying to embrace them.
1.09.2008
to me, you're always dressed in white
rest assured, originally uploaded by that guy, matthew moses.And I will wait until the right boy says just that to me.
Until then, I'm content living my life for God
And I'm eager to share that outlook with everyone in my life!
On the Agenda for the Week:
hip hop tonight
swing dancing tomorrow
Fripple Awards on friday
blues dancing after the awards
prayer meeting for Stang & Scrum saturday
coffee with Julie on sunday
second CYT class on monday
I'm excited!
1.08.2008
let me pray for you
Prayer Board, originally uploaded by ninjaneil902.I got so inspired when I saw it.
I need to spend more time with God.
I need to make connections with those around me.
I need to pray more.
So I need your prayers.
So just leave a comment and I will add your prayer to my board.
I bought jeans for $100 today.
I'm ridiculous.
No more shopping.
1.07.2008
seattle dreaming
Talaris Conference Center, originally uploaded by Love Dr.. I am SO looking forward to going to Seattle over Spring Break!
I can't wait to swing dance and sight see in the city!!
I'm also hoping it answers any of my questions about moving there.
I hope everything works out with Veronica and Big Sis.
I really would love to take BOTH of them...
And Lux, if I can ever convince her!
1.06.2008
rainy sunday
first impressions, originally uploaded by raspberrytart. I'm not feeling too great tonight.
At least I get to see my Big.
And go to church at 7pm.
I hate shopping.
I hate gym clothes.
You need to work out to be able to wear workout clothes.
Therefore, workout clothes are hecka lame.
I can't even start to be excited.
1.05.2008
2008: the year of weddings
love is in the air, originally uploaded by GooseGoddessS.I may not be ready for this step in my life... and for the first time, I am totally comfortable with that fact. I know God has a plan for me where I am and I can't stand the wait to figure it out.
My love goes out to Johannah and Jared today as they commit their lives to one another and start a new life together. May God always be an active part of your lives, together and individually. Amen.
I love you, Avanti, and I look forward to spending this exciting day with you!
1.04.2008
i feel Him everywhere
Kayla, originally uploaded by A Town So Imperfect.I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the softly falling snow.
I am the gentle showers of rain.
I am the fields of ripening grain.
I am the morning hush.
I am the graceful rush
of beautiful birds in circling flight.
I am the star shine of the night.
I am the flowers that bloom.
I am in a quiet room.
I am the birds that sing.
I am in each lovely thing.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.
- Mary Elizabeth Frye
1.03.2008
got shoes?
Shoe Loves You?, originally uploaded by boopsie.daisy.Some people have even told me that they want to take me shopping for shoes and they will buy them for me as my Christmas present. I'm going to ask for purses instead. After 5 new pairs, I need to break long enough to allow them to circulate. Oh, well. That's my little shoe story. Fascinating, yes? LoL.
1.02.2008
turning new leaves
Eat Fresh (Sorta), originally uploaded by Looking Glass.Another thing I am going to try to work towards is a healthier life: choosing better foods and exercising more often. I went to Subway with Lux today and ordered a Club Sub with a fat free vinaigrette, rather than my usual Italian Sub with marinara sauce. I was also out dancing at Henry's Pub last night and I'm going out dancing at the Firehouse tomorrow. If not sooner, I hope to start working out at the ARC every monday, wednesday, and friday as well. I have been too lazy and I just need to get over it.
As for tonight, I'm going to try to get my to-do lists for tomorrow and the rest of the week recorded in my planner as I watch the end of Project Runway. Then I am going to spend some time with my Beloved before bed. I'll see you all here... tomorrow.
1.01.2008
late night/early morning journaling
Journal Page from Dec 19, 2007, originally uploaded by groovyholly.I had a lot of time on my train/bus ride down from Fresno to San Diego. Instead of sleeping, I was up all but the last hour of the 7-hour trip reading When God Writes Your Love Story and my Bible and writing in my journal. It was such a profound experience. I obviously had the option to rest so I could be alert for the following day, but I felt so free from obligations and restrictions that I just had to take full advantage of the time and commune with God.
I can't say that God changed my heart about a ton of things during the trip but in a way, He elevated all of the things that I had already realized. Some of the things that were tugging at me heart before, now feel like massive weights and I just can't ignore them anymore. So that's what is new for the year 2008... Me. Allow me to explain:
I was asked where the emphasis was in my life and my answer was:
- schedules/deadlines, school requirements, church obligations, CYT and YMCA as jobs, crushes on/obsessing over boys, and my relaxation time.
Then I was asked where the emphasis should be:
- GOD; either through Flood:worship and college group, through ΑΔΧ:as a light and for accountability, and through His word!!
I guess you could call that a wake-up call. Lame that I needed to put it into words to realize it but at least I had that! So I kept journaling...
If Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego could give up their LIVES for God, I know there are things that I should give up. I'm not of this world and I often find myself indulging in the things of this world. I'm not perfect and this isn't every single thing I need to let go of but this is the start, for now:
- televisions shows such as Gossip Girl, Desperate Housewives, and anything else that I feel promotes things such as fornication or infidelity.
- movies such as the Holiday, 40-year-old Virgin, Knocked Up, or any other movie that bases the story on sex (whether it's a chick-flick or not). It is something I can't watch without being partly convinced that it's good. The Holiday was a beautiful story and because you relate to the characters so much, you almost want to reaffirm the validity in the sexual relationship they had. I don't want to think that way, so I don't want to watch movies of that kind.
- music with messages contradictory to my own beliefs. I'd love to take in all music as a cultural experience, but I don't want to allow myself to sing along to lyrics about sex, drunkenness, drugs, and such. So I will be going through my itunes and unchecking a ton of songs (not artists)... If ANYONE would like to help me in any way, that would be much appreciated!
- most importantly (and would help me with the above), the need to conform to the world OR my christian brothers and sisters. My walk is different from anyone else's so it shouldn't be influenced by anyone but God. This is most important in the areas of cursing, crude discussions, and acting or dancing in ways meant only for my future spouse.
I know, I'm long-winded and I apologize but if you are still reading at this point, I hope you write a comment. I'd love to know what things you're going to changing for 2008. That being said, here's the hardest change I have this year:
God treasures our purity for reasons beneficial to us! He loves and cherishes it and continues to do so, even when we do not. So will my husband. Knowing that what I'm doing now matters to God and my future husband, how can my life reflect that?
- I can find the acceptance and reassurance that I crave from God.
- I will no longer look at myself as single and up for grabs but betrothed to Jesus and my future husband.
- As someone who is taken, I will not pursue after men and rather allow my future husband to seek me out and pursue me. I'm not sure what that means for future relationships, but I'm going to trust that God will reveal that to me when it's time.
- I don't simply want his head to turn, but his heart as well!
So, that's it. That's a lot but that's it. They are not resolutions, but life changes. I am BOUND to mess up, but I'm not going to let that stop me from trying again!
"Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe." - Philippians 2:14-15 (NIV).
12.31.2007
2007 blessings
* Happy New Year .., originally uploaded by P e ® s o n.All my love and God's blessings...
2007 is all tied up and I'm ready for 2008's Happy New Year!
12.30.2007
12.29.2007
she's goin' to the pasture and she's gunna get married
The hills are alive, originally uploaded by hebedesign.Thoughts
Uncontrollably
Sporadic!
Yet centered around One center
Joy.
In plush ripe tones
Joy is rushing through my Bones!
If Joy were a Color
It would be Purple
Pastel
Pretty.
Like old women and young children
Both wear on Easter,
Smiling while having deviled eggs
And drinking Kool-Aid,
Chasing blown Bubbles
In the backyard.
The young ones' distracting hats
Fly off...
And the old ones laugh
A Contagious laughter
That is to be shared
By everyone there!
The Sun
Shines down upon them
As all of their Physical Imperfections
Gleam
Beautifully.
And inside
Inside here
I feel like this
And I look outside my window
And imagine the
Future Purple Pastel Pretty
Moments of Joy
That I will one day have with my Wife.
And my Children.
My Friends.
And my Family.
I really look forward to Those Moments.
But I am Thankful for the one
That I am having Right Now.
This morning.
Alone.
On my couch.
Overwhelmed.
By Joy."
- Bradley Hathaway
12.28.2007
night crawler
Amtrak at Night, originally uploaded by Matt (mistergoleta).Pray for us. And pray for Lauren especially.
Pray for her peace of mind. And pray that the wedding plans fall into place. We want God to be in total control and we need all the help in praying that we can get. For those of you who end up praying, even a small prayer, our hearts go out to you and thank you immensely!
I hope everyone is enjoy their Friday.
Love and God bless.
12.27.2007
sickening
I hate it.
I have nothing else to say.
other than... I'm leaving for Fresno in 3 hours!
12.26.2007
maid of honor duties
Bridesmaid, originally uploaded by Rohan Phillips.They're gorgeous...
And oddly enough, we found one kind of dress that fits us all well!
Strapless, floor-length, rouged to the side, and PINK!!
I guess the technical name for the color is Watermelon... but it's pink.
I'm so glad that we were able to accomplish that task.
One more bridesmaid needs to be sized and then we're done.
I wonder what shoes we'll end up buying...
Good day.
David's Bridal is pretty sweet.
Original Mock-up for the Wedding
12.25.2007
i'm a tangled mess
Not Quite Candle Light, originally uploaded by vania_b.I just was a bit overwhelmed when I wrote my last post.
I think my thoughts are sorted a bit better now.
It was a really fantastic holiday!
I'm a bit bummed that we didn't pray over the food as a family, but that's what happens when we eat a casual lunch instead of the normal dinner. The time I got to spend with Lauren and Dayna was amazing and we played dominoes for so long that I could hardly think straight anymore. However, I was still the WINNER of the whole game!!
I had a Very Merry Christmas, did you?!
it's christmas
Aftermath, originally uploaded by The Eye of Brad.I was so excited about giving my sister her gift...
We worked very hard on a gift for our mom...
Dana and I fought...
Mom loved the gift...
We were supposed to get Dad a gift together...
I looked for the gift, but Dana got her own...
I didn't find the gift...
I asked for her to include me and I bought some beer to add...
The bad part: I didn't tell Dana that I got Mom another gift...
She didn't know till I handed it to Mom and I made her feel awful...
So she cried...
I feel awful.
I'm really not enjoying myself anymore.
I feel like I let her down.
This sucks.
happy christmas
merry christmas!, originally uploaded by anzyAprico.I pray that your day is spent with loved ones.
That you can enjoy the festive events.
And experience the blessing that is Christ, our Savior.
♥
♥ ♥
♥ ♥ ♥
12.24.2007
merry christmas eve
., originally uploaded by sakura*aya.This has been an amazing weekend and I'm just more excited for the week ahead! I can't wait for the candlelight service tonight.
...and Christmas TOMORROW!!
Check it!
12.23.2007
welcome wreath
sleigh bells, originally uploaded by SpacePotato.I'm planning on meeting with my mom today and then getting together with my sister to figure out some last minute details. The plan was to sleep in since I didn't have to work FloodKids this morning and was up past 4am... Alas, a call from my aunt at 10:15am woke me up and I haven't been able to fall asleep since. So I'm cozy on my couch wrapped in a quilt and typing with the TV humming in the background. I dozed off for a few seconds and received a text. So I'm up. Next step: putting my quilt back on the bed and getting out the door.
I'm tired.
I'm thirsty.
And I'm a bit dizzy.
Have a great Sunday everyone!
12.22.2007
the christmas angel says 'merry christmas'
Don't Talk About Our Son, Martha, originally uploaded by gregeichelberger.The company was perfect.
The 'afterward' was just awesome.
I am so glad that Veronica convinced me of everything.
Thank you, Veronica. You're super smart!
And now, I play the waiting game.
Yeah!!
12.21.2007
it's a CCT christmas
Lockettes, originally uploaded by gregeichelberger.I can't wait to go to see Traditions tomorrow.
It has nothing to do with the beautiful "lockettes."
Nothing to do with the cute boy, of whom I have a crush.
And nothing to do with the cheaper seats we got.
But it has EVERYTHING to do with the HOT CHICK I'm going with!!
Love you Veronica and I'll see you tomorrow.
*** As for today, I'm getting back on the horse and going to try me hand at swing dancing again. Atomic Ballroom, here I come!
12.20.2007
feeling a bit lost
Looking at the Map, originally uploaded by perkyNbLue.And I don't know how to get out just yet
I'll just stay here and count the days as they pass
Is it odd that I feel like I'm missing them all?
So this is me saying that I give it to God.
I'm giving it all up:
The worrying. The stress. The indecisiveness.
The insecurities. The self-pity. The jealousy.
I don't need it. And I don't want it. So take it!
12.19.2007
chucks are my swing shoes
And grooved to the tunes
I forgot all else
Nothing to do but move
Chucks squeak on the floor
A strong hand guides my way
I hold my arms strong
As we swing and we sway
I don't want it to end
My feet just never seem to stop
A sudden and perfect dip
And I could just drop
Can't wait to dance tomorrow... although I'm sore from last night.
12.18.2007
when I dip, you dip
Revolution Prelims, originally uploaded by Swifty.And I'm super excited!!
It's not everyday that I get to go out to a Pub...
With my Big and my Best, Loox.
I hope all ya'll are having a nice night.
Stay safe!
12.17.2007
christmas: almost here
christmas fruit, originally uploaded by faeriewings1.So Merry almost Christmas.
yeah!
12.16.2007
several days watching the tube
great nite in, originally uploaded by SpacePotato.No classes for me
I am just waiting for grades
So movies I'll watch
12.15.2007
signing surprise
Surprise!, originally uploaded by Penelope's Loom.So allow me to SURPRISE you all and say...
I love you!, originally uploaded by tweaker73.12.14.2007
sleigh bells are ringing
candy canes, originally uploaded by SpacePotato.YEAH!!
12.13.2007
praise God
I know that stressed more than was necessary, but I got through it and that's what matters. I just have to rewrite one more paper and get it in by noon tomorrow to raise a grade, but otherwise I'm done!! I'm so stoked. And I'm so TIRED! So I'm going to take a shower and pray that wakes me up. I want to just enjoy tonight. Man, Finals stink.
♥♥♥
12.12.2007
date night
Candace at Lunch, originally uploaded by perkyNbLue.My date with Candace.
I had a few breakdowns today, but at least I got to spend time with my best friend one-on-one. I love when we're able to set aside time just for us. It's the best!
12.11.2007
driven
- finish finals with the strength from GOD, because I don't have it
- finish the reading in my Year Bible so I can give it to my mom for the New Year
- go through apartment, finish unpacking, and put things in their place (including the pictures that still need hanging)
- set up my life calendar before the New Year
Goals for the year 2008:
- write down "intentions" for each week so I can work towards something worthwhile, rather than getting bogged down by the have-to's and should-do's
- keep Lauren sane for her wedding
- graduate
Hopes:
- that I might discover God's plan for me as a single woman
- that I am able to positively influence the lives of people I come into contact with
pit of the peach
James and the Giant Peach, originally uploaded by me.Remember when it was something you actually looked forward to?
Remember when all you had to show was the finishing product?
What happened to THAT?
I miss it.
I miss doing things like drawing and creating and playing...
... WITHOUT feeling guilty!!
Now, back to reality and writing papers for finals.
12.10.2007
cold beer?
Cold Beer, originally uploaded by Beauty fer Ashes.She's not too far along
She is however chatting up
A chum, a future beau?
12.09.2007
chalk drawings
chalklove!, originally uploaded by becaboo.God, be my strength and my shield as I try to praise you with my diligence and hard work. Amen.
12.08.2007
anxiety takes over
So as I have been wanting to do for a long time, my plan is to lock myself in my room for a good while to just focus on God, His word, His love, His strength, His grace, and mostly importantly right now, His PEACE!
As they say, "No Jesus, no peace. Know Jesus, know peace."
12.07.2007
12.06.2007
be still
, originally uploaded by lovegaby.12.05.2007
serenity
yay i went to the beach!, originally uploaded by becaboo.All the while becoming more tired and perplexed
I reach for the tunnel's ending bright light
As the clock ticks down and day turns to night
One thing I'm forgetting, one thing I've been missing
I discovered suddenly as I began reminiscing
In the past, when I was feeling sad and alone
God was the one to bring me back home
He is the answer and the only true key
He knows what I want and who I need to be
With sincerity and love, He carries my load
As He directs my way along this serene road
(not my best, but the first version was deleted)
12.04.2007
anxiously awaiting
Omaggio ad agedsenator, originally uploaded by danydrs72.And I should be getting the one in the foreground.
I simply cannot wait!
It WILL be amazing...
No rebuttal!!
sinking
|Into the Abyss|, originally uploaded by *JBR_JBR.I'm sinking
I can but hardly breathe
Hands are shaking
My confidence fading
And I'm searching for the "out"
If you find it, let me know
I need a remedy quick
Sicknesses overwhelming me
One more assignment
A few more awkward moments
Until I may retire for the night
I'll be diligent
Get things done quick
Just to spend time with You...
I need You...
Just You.
Now.
12.03.2007
my hope
Psalm 46:10, originally uploaded by lovegaby.Let me count the ways!
Still doing the first Chem Lab that's due tomorrow.
I'd rather be conversing with God!
12.02.2007
caffeinated study sesh
John 14:27, originally uploaded by i am a mermaid princess..
I thought this was extremely appropriate with finals just around the corner. I am already done with one of my classes and I have a few more assignments and exams for the others.
I really need to buckle down for Chemistry.
- - -
- - -
- - -
- - -
- - -
- - -
- - - Math Final Exam (next thursday afternoon)
- - - Eng A Paper Rewrite (by next friday afternoon)
He'll give me strength
He'll give me peace
He'll give me direction
He'll put all at ease
-- by photographer
12.01.2007
my bleeding heart
Dicentra spectabilis, originally uploaded by ngawangchodron. "It is at the edge of a petal that love waits."
- William Carlos Williams
I wore my heart on my sleeve
Can't remember where it all led me.
But I remember the breakups,
Make-ups,
The everywhere and in between.
I struggled to fall asleep some nights,
Trying to relive those moments.
But now I have found friends,
Hope,
And the Love I'll always need.
Guide my heart through these next few years,
As I see my friends become spouses.
Lead me to find my purpose,
Peace,
And patience, as I wait for the man of my dreams.
"Write it on your heart that every day is the best day of the year."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
11.30.2007
elated erasers
I've been feeling really inspired lately... I will hopefully be receiving the macBook for Christmas (and probably pay for part of it), and once I have it, I can upload my photos from my phone, to my computer, and to the internet. With that I might be able to start my own photo blogs! I love the photos I'm finding online in the meantime. On that note, I'm going to get back to it.
♥ Lauren
11.29.2007
poopie-be-gone
Time for bed.
I have to get up for work in the morning.
Peace.
the tree
Slow me down, Lord.
Ease the pounding of my heart by quieting of my mind.
Steady my hurried pace with a vision of the eternal reach of time.
Give me, amid the confusion of the day, the calmness of the everlasting hills.
Break the tension of my nerves and muscles with the soothing music of the singing streams that live in my memory.
Teach me the art of taking minute vacations--of slowing down to look at a flower, to chat with a friend, to pat a dog, to smile at a child, to read a few lines from a good book.
Slow me down, Lord, and inspire me to send my roots deep into the soil of life's enduring values, that I may grow toward my greater destiny.
Remind me each day that the race is not always to the swift; that there is more to life than increasing its speed.
Let me look upward to the towering oak and know that it grew great and strong because it grew slowly and well.
Colossians 2:6-7
"So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in Him, rooted and built up in Him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness."
11.24.2007
late night/early morning coffee
I'm sitting in Lestat's with my best friend.
Slowly, I'm starting to get sleepy.
I don't know how much longer we will be out.
If I drink more caffeine now, I'll be up for a while longer.
Here's my decision:
Diet soda.
I am so glad that Lauren was able to come down from Fresno. I'm very glad that we got to just hang out and watch movies with Tommy. I am excited to see Veronica tomorrow. I look forward to my last theatre presentation on Tuesday... It's going to be stinkin' sweet!! I cannot wait for this stressful and busy semester to end! This is signing off for the night.
God is good.








