loves linkedin & all it's done for me

218/365 Year Two, originally uploaded by coreena.

Now, I would like you to "imagine one area in your life that you want to work on or make a change in. This could be your relationship, a friendship, work. Anything. Think about one specific change that you’d like to see happen in that area, and then you turn to a friend or your partner and you play the ‘Remembering Forward’ game. [It's now December] 2011 and that change you wanted to see happen? It did. Your dialogue with your friend or partner makes it come alive."
[via asweetspoon]

I imagine myself scrambling to do one of two things (maybe even both): to lesson plan the coming months before the break comes to a quick end or to shove as much fun as I possibly can into my remaining time before returning to MY classroom. I will probably be living in San Jose, but spend most of my vacation in San Francisco. I'll be a bit more frazzled, far more pressed for time, and looking for any chance to take a break. I know this. And yet I still want it? Yeah, as crazy as it may seem, it's the only thing I'm sure of right now.

Since this is the new year eve's post, I'm going to hit you hard with a review post of epic proportions! Let's start with music:

^{2007 Pop Music Mashup: DJ Earworm
2008 Pop Music Mashup: DJ Earworm
2009 Pop Music Mashup: DJ Earworm}
And the 2010 Pop Music Mashup:



My 11 resolutions in 2011 (to be revisited on July 1st):
<sub>1. leave only 1 tab open on my computer each night
2. drink 1 cup of water for each cup of coffee [realistic editing]
3. record at least 3 sentences on my blog each day
4. recap with pictures quarterly (4 photo recaps in 2011)
5. clean my room/house/car every 5 days (dates divisible by 5)
6. read at least 1 new job-related book each month
7. abstain from clothing purchases for a year (trading is ok)
8. eat, drink, learn, or try something new each month
9. throw out or give away unused items (avoid repurposing)
10. try a new recipe twice a month (on the 14th and 28th)
11. focus at least a half-hour a day on job-searching

2010 Recap by Month:
JAN: attended BFX and it changed my life!
FEB: snagged more work with I Love A Clean San Diego
MAR: reunited with the long-distance boy & made it official
APR: got environmental & danced as much as I worked
MAY: celebrated my birthday with friends in the Bay
JUN: work died down, but I got to attend the Blues Recess
JUL: began organizing & DJing SD blues events
AUG: quit my jobs, up & moved to SF without a plan
SEP: snagged a second job subbing for charters
OCT: received allergy tests & a final diagnosis
NOV: took a long-term position subbing at RLS
DEC: job interviews, holiday parties, & family time

It's been a crazy, but good year...

I'm excited for 2011.


Bring it!</sub>

making a resolution for a new year?

Now, originally uploaded by kkalyan.

_{Be deliberate
Resist the urge to impulsively make pledges for the upcoming year based on what's bothering you at a specific moment. Spend a week, or longer, evaluating your priorities for the new year and think about how your resolution fits with these objectives. This is a great conversation to have with a friend, "Could you see me doing this goal, this year?"
Leave the past behind
Refrain from adopting old resolutions to prevent past regrets from following you into the future. Instead, redefine failed goals. If "lose weight" didn't work last year, consider the new approaches of "eat healthier" or "exercise five days a week"
Stay positive
Swearing off bad habits such as "I will never bite my nails again" only emphasizes the forbidden behavior. For better results, cast resolutions in a flattering light and vow to "Take better care of my hands and nails"
Shorten the deadline
Recent research found 80 percent of people don't keep their resolution past Valentine's Day. Maintain yours until July 1 and you will have accomplished more than most. We're betting the buzz you get from successfully making reaching the six-month mark will carry you the rest of the year.
Define the obstacles
Acknowledging and preparing for the challenges upfront allows you to better navigate bumps in the road ahead.
Go public with your plans
Telling others about your goals helps you in a couple of ways. Writing the goals down and sharing them with others can increase your sense of responsibility to meet your objectives. It also gives others insight into what you are trying to accomplish and opens new doors for support.
[via Lia Steakley Dicker, of 43things]}

I'm trying to narrow down my resolutions into attainable goals for the new year. I like the ones that I have already posted below, but I have some that I need to work in about sleep, organization, learning Spanish, attaining a permanent job, environmental practices, and cooking. Get excited. I'm determined to make things happen!

by the light of the fire

gypsy, originally uploaded by Kristen Drozdowski..

Last night was simply magical.

I will never be able to sum it up in words and I am totally okay with that fact. Power outages, the Black Swan, steak dinner, Parks & Rec, and perfection. Mmm...

More, please.


Once I recover, of course.

and a sweet-tooth to boot

sweet lips, originally uploaded by gracelina..

These past few weeks have truly been amazing... my best holiday season yet. It's been filled with family and friends and good food. We just finished up the last of the holiday parties yesterday, with David's extended family on his dad's side. I'm scared for the coming week and the fact that my sleep cycle is complete crap now. I may need to pull another all-nighter to get it back on track, since that seems to be the easiest way for me to get that done.

The best/worst part of the holidays is the immense amount of candy that collects. Right now, I have six different sources in my immediate possession. I snack on them all day long and I have little to no motivation to remedy that. In somewhat related news, I have yet to find a diet that works for me... I'm either eating too much or simply eating the wrong things. I need to make some changes, but I haven't decided how to go about that just yet. And yes, I know that the candy would be a good start... Thanks.

time to turn some new leaves

bench, originally uploaded by H@Ru.

I know I need to straighten up and bring my life back into line a bit. I have several ideas already, but one that I'm less sure of is this blog and whether or not I should make a new one. It would be easier to ignore it and to continue writing here, but I feel like it may be beneficial to start from scratch, without the controversial posts of my past. While I ponder a bit more, here are a few more of my ideas for the new year:

<sub>1. leave only 1 tab open on my computer each night
2. drink 2 cups of water for each cup of coffee
3. record at least 3 sentences on my blog each day
4. clean my room/house/car every 4 days or so
5. read at least 1 new job-related book each month
6. abstain from clothing purchases for a year (trading ok)</sub>

I also want to figure out some realistic goals for exercising and pleasure reading. If you have suggestions or tips, they would be greatly appreciated.

i feel the universe greeting me

TFAPhotoEssay06, originally uploaded by asuinitiatives.

I feel like an addict.

I cannot explain how strange it is to wake up each morning, fighting off my basic instincts, which all push me to burrow back under the covers. Instead I eagerly throw on my nicest clothes and head out for the day, pumped for an hour drive to work. My body has never enjoyed early rising and it's really no different now, but I have something great waiting for me.

Having the ability to touch the lives of children each and every day is tremendously motivating and gives true meaning to all the work I do. I know that things will be different once I get my own classroom... I'll have new gripes and new obstacles to overcome... but the truth of the matter is that it is utterly heart-breaking to leave a school, without the knowledge of when I'll be back or whether or not the 5 minute side-mini-lesson really sunk in for the student I helped at the end of class.

The weekends are tough because although, I'm ecstatic that I have the time to recollect and relax, I begin to miss the kids and their constant stream of questions, observations, and discoveries. I can't seem to get enough of it.

Teaching is my greatest goal and my greatest fear. It's a fear that I desperately want to confront and overcome and one school, in particular, stands out against the rest as a place that supports and strengthens the teachers' journeys, in the classroom. I want to drive my students to a greater future and stay in touch as they move on to high school and college.

I'm looking on towards a better future.
And I can't get enough of it!

<sub>My love is safe for the universe
See me now I'm bursting
On one planet, so many turns
Different worlds
Singing "Ah-la-ah-ah ah-ah-ah-ah ah"

Fill my heart with discipline
Put there for the teaching
In my head see clouds of stairs
Help me as I'm reaching
The future's paved with better days

Not running from something
I'm running towards the day
Wide awake

A whisper once quiet
Now rising to a scream
Right in me

I'm falling, free falling
Words calling me
Up off my knees

I'm soaring and darling
You'll be the one that I can need
Still be free

Our future's paved with better days
[Eddie Vedder]</sub>

today is a good day, but...

265/365 Year Two, originally uploaded by coreena.

yesterday was better.

My eyes are acting up again, besides the fact that I got my allergy test and tested negative for everything. It's really frustrating and quite a blow to my confidence, entering new classrooms each day. It means that I am forced to talk about it each and every day. To explain why my eyes look red and watery over and over again. *le sigh*

I wasn't called in to work today, which means I had time to take care of my eyes as best as I can. I am hoping that, although they're still bad now, they will be better by tomorrow morning. Also, hoping to actually have WORK tomorrow. I hate waiting by a phone that doesn't ring. I can't wait until I have a real job.

<sup>I saw you looking at me girl
When I first set foot into the room
You didn't want me to see girl
You didn't wanna lay your cards so soon

I see you mulling it over
You wonder what your friends might think of you
Angel on your shoulder
But you know just what you want to do

No I don't need to know a thing about your past
No I just want one night with you no strings attached
And I know that we might not be the perfect match
And i just want one night with you no strings attached
[Mayer Hawthorne]</sup>

bought me some new duds

Teach For America-ASU partnership, originally uploaded by Arizona State University.

As you may have gathered at this point, for those who know me outside of this blog especially, my life has been rather hectic. I am substitute teaching in San Jose, at an amazing school called Rocketship. I have a three week stint lined up, starting tomorrow (which is good, since I laid down some serious money shopping for new clothes today).

On top of this wonderful new job, I am also working for Sylvan. I was originally working as a Diagnostician, unsure whether I would be tutoring any time soon. As it so happens, I have now begun the necessary training to be one of the tutors. I have some online tests to do tomorrow night, because I don't want to do them tonight, and then some on-site training on Wednesday night.

Life is crazy.
But life is so so good. :)

<sub>You've got a dark heart
You've got a cold kiss

You are my love, my love, my love
(You are my love)

Always turning back to you
'til you never let me down
Loving your illusions
Staring at a crooked crown

You always let me down
[the Hush Sound]</sub>

blogger has changed so much

So We Keep Waiting, originally uploaded by Boy_Wonder.

So I tried to convince myself to just post on my new blog, to move on from this one, and start fresh. Alas, I have been visiting my usual blog reads recently and noticed all of the changes here on blogger... I just couldn't resist checking it out! So, I make absolutely no promises about posting more often now, but I must say...

it feels kinda nice to be blogging on here again.

It feels like home...
which, at this point, is very hard to come by. :)

_{Now we see everything that's going wrong
With the world and those who lead it
We just feel like we don't have the means
To rise above and beat it
[John Mayer]}

out with the old & in with new

If you have been missing my posts, feel free to check out my tweets during the past month (tweet), but to continue following via blog, may I redirect you to my new site (typepad). I have also started back up with the picture-a-day project (flickr), so check in there from time to time, if you feel so inclined.

Oh, and blog more often!!

i'm much tougher than a lion

I'm Growing Up Faster Than I Ever Thought I Would, originally uploaded by Boy_Wonder.

I feel like I'm outgrowing my home.
It's frustrating to feel constrained by the lack of jobs.
Mer... I just hope this coming week will help that.
*sigh*

<sub>They can say whatever
I'ma do whatever
No pain is forever
Yup, you know this

Tougher than a lion
Ain't no need in tryin'
I live where the sky ends
Yup, you know this


No fear, and while you getting your cry on
I'm getting my fly on
Sincere, I see you aiming at my pedastal
I betta let ya' know
♫ Rihanna</sub>

see the roles done switched

Me & the Students, originally uploaded by perkyNbLue.

I was kinda sad that I was unable to get a picture with my Monday class, but I'm just excited that I was able to get this one! The kid standing off to the right is also in the class and no, I haven't a clue as to why he is so far from the rest of us. Anyway... THEY WERE GREAT!!

I still think that Monday's performance went a lot more smoothly, but I loved it all the same. I was late for lindy afterward, but it was an interesting class all the same. I even think it's possible that I might be able to teach the lead for the move that we learned tonight, but that remains to be seen.

_{Can't nobody do it like Kim
only women that can do it like men
VVS's be them gems
(ho, now count that)
my money coming in
bending them corners on them rims
so play the check book tell me how do you bounce that
I bounce into position like I invented the Karma Sutra
but money make me come, go and ask Luda
and women cheat better than men we don't disturb them
my motto is "what they don't know won' hurt them"
we just do it like you do, see the roles done switched
♫ Ludacris}

if I could write you a song

Our Beer, originally uploaded by perkyNbLue.

What did I do after my full day of work today?

Eat pizza and drink cider... and some other alcoholic drink.

Best. Idea. Ever.

<sub>If I could write you a song,
And make you fall in love,
I would already have you up under my arm.
I used up all my tricks,
I hope that you like this.
But you probably won't,
You think you're cooler than me.

You got designer shades,
Just to hide your face and
You wear them around like,
You're cooler than me.
And you never say hey,
Or remember my name.
It's probably cause, you think you're cooler than me.

You got your hot crowd,
Shoes on your feet,
And you wear them around,
Like they ain't shit.
But you don't know,
The way that you look,
When your steps
Make
That
Much
Noise.
♫ Mike Posner</sub>

ain't got love like you should

201 / 365 - Dance with me, originally uploaded by Noukka Signe.

My private blues lesson went really well today and after a very informative ichat with David, I feel prepared for the private lesson on Friday. Yay! I have also given some thought to DJing some time soon... however, that is still yet to be decided. I have to scour my library for tunes that I already have and may even need to dL a few new ones. Let's hope that's not the case. I'd prefer to avoid that, if at all possible. Mer.

<sub>You ain't got no kind of feeling inside
I got something that will sure 'nuff set your stuff on fire
You refuse to put anything before your pride
I got something that will knock all your pride aside

Tell me something good (tell me, tell me, tell me)
Tell me that you love me
Tell me something good (tell me, tell me, tell me)
Tell me that you like it, yeah

Got no time is what you're known to say
I'll make you wish there were 48 hours to each day
Problem is you ain't been loved like you should
What I got to give will sure 'nuff do you good
♫ Chaka Khan Rufus</sub>

i can see us holding hands

JUMP, originally uploaded by ElementaryPenguin.

The CYT performance went delightfully well this afternoon. I am so proud of my kids and I was sad to leave them. They have made incredible strides with their singing and dancing abilities and I hope to see them excel to great heights! So cute.

As for the job search, it's going really well. Tomorrow will hopefully bring some answers since the holiday will finally be over. I am nervous and excited and ready to jump in!! I am just hoping to get some more sleep in... *yawn*

<sub>If I wrote you a symphony,
Just to say how much you mean to me
If I told you you were beautiful
Would you date me on the regular
Well, baby I've been around the world
But I ain't seen myself another girl
This ring here represents my heart
But there's just one thing I need from you

Yeah, because
I can see us holding hands
Walking on the beach, our toes in the sand
I can see us on the countryside
Sitting on the grass, laying side by side
You could be my baby, let me make you my lady
Girl, you amaze me
Ain't gotta do nothing crazy
See, all I want you to do is be my love
(So don't give away) My love, (So don't give away) My love
(So don't give away) Ain't another woman that can take your spot, my love
(So don't give away) My love, (So don't give away) My love
(So don't give away) Ain't another woman that can take your spot, my love

Now, if I wrote you a love note
And made you smile with every word I wrote
Would that make you want to change your scene
And wanna be the one on my team
♫ Justin Timberlake</sub>

if you liking this position

Should Have Left My Phone At Home 'Cuz This Is A Disaster, originally uploaded by Boy_Wonder.

Okay... So I went a little over-board...
On the internet looking through the flurry of postings until 4:30am.
I have a hard time going to sleep when I get in these moods.

I stopped, for now, but in the morning (noon) I'm applying for...
- the Google Children's Center
- 5 Site/Program Manager positions for various nonprofits
- Operations Manager for KIPP Bay Area School

*sigh* Now... sleep... I hope.

<sub>i love how you approach me
Fresh white with yo pants sagging grown man low
everything you saying soundin good to me
dont need to convince me anymore swagger is right
one blade is tight
and i smell yo cologne in the air
baby you doing something right
you just canceled every otha man here
you say you like my butt and the color of nails
you can see that i got it going on
i wanna make sure you remember me so im gon leave my number
on yo video phone
i got no time for fronting
i know just what im wanting
if its gonna be you and me
when i call they betta see me on yo video screen

them hustlas keep on talking
they like the way im walking
you saying that you want me
so press record ill let you film me
on yo video phone
make a cameo
tape me on yo video phone i can handle you
watch me on yo video phone on yo video video if you wont me you can watch me on yo video phone


you know them g's they be hollerin specially them hot ones
brooklyn atlanta houston to new orleans
when they see me they be like yo B
let me call you
you breaking my focus boy you cute and you balling
you like it when i shake it
shawty on a mission wat yo name is what you want me naked
if you liking this position
you can tape it
on yo video phone
♫ Beyonce</sub>

look to all our younger years

Random Randoms, originally uploaded by perkyNbLue.

It has been a fine day in San Diego today.

I got home at 4am and had plenty of time to sleep before Lauren came over to visit. Very shortly after she left, Big was dropped off and we went up to visit with the rest of the Random family (shown above, minus 2, plus 2). It was a wonderful lunch, filled with amazing conversations, reminding me of the many blessings that they have brought to me.

Big and I spent the rest of the evening at the sorority house, chatting it up with the sisters and discussing the old days. It was nice to look back and nice to catch up. I think I am finally feeling accepted. It just took a while longer for me. Heh.

<sub>Oh - thinkin' about all our younger years
There was only you and me
We were young and wild and free

Now nothin' can take you away from me
We bin down that road before
But that's over now
You keep me comin' back for more

Baby you're all that I want
When you're lyin' here in my arms
I'm findin' it hard to believe
We're in heaven
And love is all that I need
And I found it there in your heart
It isn't too hard to see
We're in heaven

Oh - once in your life you find someone
Who will turn your world around
Bring you up when you're feelin' down

Ya - nothin' could change what you mean to me
Oh there's lots that I could say
But just hold me now
Cause our love will light the way
♫ Bryan Adams</sub>

there's no one here to save

Always Ready To Make A Change, originally uploaded by Boy_Wonder.

No one here to save, because I'm the one who will do the saving. I spent my morning filling out applications and sending cover letters in to non-profit organizations in the Bay Area. I made sure to check my contacts and double-checked my information for anything I could add or alter, in order to better my chances.

I'd say that the waiting game has begun, but the application has just started. I don't have the time to wait it out. Mer.

<sub>You've got opinions man
We're all entitled to 'em
But I never asked
So let me thank you for your time
And try not to waste any more of mine
Get out of here fast

I hate to break it to you babe
But I'm not drowning
There's no one here to save

Who cares if you disagree
You are not me
Who made you king of anything
So you dare tell me who to be
Who died and made you king of anything

You sound so innocent
All full of good intent
Swear you know best
But you expect me to
Jump up on board with you
And ride off into your delusional sunset

I'm not the one who's lost
With no direction, oh
But you'll never see
You're so busy making maps
With my name on them in all caps
You got the talking down
Just not the listening


All my life I've tried
To make everybody happy while I
Just hurt and hide
Waiting for someone to tell me it's my turn to decide
♫ Sara Bareilles</sub>

the way you touch me there

closeup, originally uploaded by roboppy.

Every day should end like this: sitting at a cozy table, in a noisy pub, with good friends, enjoying pizza and beer. Mm... It was a really fantastic way to conclude the day.

My CYT class went pretty well, even though I was stressing to get everything crammed in the two hours that we had to practice. I am very proud of them and I am eager to see them perform for their parents next week. It should be great!

Afterwards, I rushed over to Alicia Milo's lindy class and danced to my heart's content. It was really nice to finally put our moves to music, complete the routine with a routine, and easily dance to the tunes once the class was complete.

The bar was the perfect place to cool down and decompress from the classes stresses as well. I was surprised that I needed it, but I'm glad to be back at it next week... Basic techniques, check. New dance moves still yet to come!! :D

<sub>Tonight... I'ma let you be the captain
Tonight... I'ma let you do your thing, yeah
Tonight... I'ma let you be a rider
Giddy up, giddy up, giddy up, babe

Tonight... I'ma let it be fire
Tonight... I'ma let you take me higher
Tonight... Baby we can get it on, yeah
We can get it on, yeah

Do you like it boy
I wa-wa-want
What you wa-wa-want
Give it to me baby
Like boom, boom, boom
What I wa-wa-want
Is what you wa-wa-want
Na, na-aaaah

Come here rude boy, boy
Can you get it up?
Come here rude boy, boy
Is you big enough?
Take it, take it (yeah)
Baby, baby (yeah)
Take it, take it (yeah)
Love me, love me (yeah)

Tonight... I'ma give it to you harder
Tonight... I'ma turn your body out
Relax... Let me do it how I wanna
If you got it, I need it, and I'mma put it down

Buckle up... I'ma give it to you stronger
Hands up... We can go a little longer
Tonight... I'ma get a little crazy
Get a little crazy, baby

I like the way you touch me there
I like the way you pull my hair
Babe, if I don't feel it I ain't faking
No, no

I like when you tell me kiss me there
I like when you tell me move it there
♫ Rihanna</sub>

i'll wear leather and jeans

M is for Muppet Mayhem, originally uploaded by Boy_Wonder.

It's official.
The muppets are insanely awesome!!
I just watched all of the LOST: Untangled episodes from this season.
THEY ARE FANTASTIC!
Even if you don't watch the show...
Well...
Don't get terribly upset with me if I'm wrong about that...
But either way, they are hilarious and I just can't get enough!!
[CHECK IT OUT]

<sub>Leather and jeans
Your watch glamorous
Not sure what it means
But this photo of us
It don't have a price
Ready for those flashing lights
'Cause you know that baby I

I'm your biggest fan
I'll follow you until you love me
Papa-paparazzi
Baby there's no other superstar
You know that I'll be your
Papa-paparazzi

Promise I'll be kind
But I won't stop until that boy is mine
Baby you'll be famous
Chase you down until you love me
Papa-paparazzi

I'll be your girl
Backstage at your show
Velvet ropes and guitars
Yeah cause you'll know
I'm staring between the sets
Eyeliner and cigarettes
♫ Greyson Chance

[today's song chosen as a tribute to GLEE's Gaga episode]</sub>

i want to leave it all behind

To Do List, originally uploaded by Boy_Wonder.

I forget to do everything else on my list...
Maybe I should add breathing to it or I might forget it as well.

I'm really lame, actually.
I played online all day, rather than get applications filled out.
Procrastination, back the heck off!!!
Please.

<sub>And so it is
Just like you said it should be
We'll both forget the breeze
Most of the time
And so it is
The colder water
The blower's daughter
The pupil in denial

I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes...

Did I say that I loathe you?
Did I say that I want to
Leave it all behind?

I can't take my mind off you
I can't take my mind off you...
♫ Damien Rice</sub>

i don't condemn or convert

Oh Peace Train Take This Country, Come Take Me Home Again, originally uploaded by Boy_Wonder.

I'm not quite sure why I'm so perturbed about Lost's finale. I just find the surprise religious ending to be the ultimate cop-out to what was a really great show! If I could just erase the last twenty minutes of the finale, I would a much happier person.

Maybe in a few more days it will digest and I will be able to stomach the whole thing. Anyone willing to talk about it and help to ease my mind?

<sub>Love is my religion, Love is my religion, Love is my religion
I'll take you to the temple tonight

All my days I've been searching to find out what this life is worth
Through the books and bibles of time I've made up my mind
I don't condemn, I don't convert, this is a calling have you heard
Bring all the lovers to the fold, cause no one is gonna lose their soul

Love is my religion, Love is my religion, Love is my religion
Hey, you can take it or leave it, and you don't have to believe it
♫ Ziggy Marley</sub>

leave the boyfriend behind

Tequila Sequence, originally uploaded by blaster22485.

Spent the night boozing it up with Amanda.
I had my first ever shot of tequila...
It was pretty damned good!
She's a horrible influence on me!!
LoL.

<sub>I'm not ready
and I'm not even close
I'm not like the rest
No, i ain't like most
So don't hold your breath
And don't count to ten.
I'm still messing up
Gonna do it again.

So lets go out late
Drink a lot
Stay up past eight and then dance
Dance all night
Leave our boyfriends behind.
Leave our boyfriends...

One hand on the trigger
and one eye out for ghosts
One foot on the floor
and one glass in the toast
We're not ready
and we're not even close
We're not like the rest
No, we ain't like most

So lets go out late
Drink a lot
Stay up past eight
And then dance
Dance all night
Leave our boyfriends behind
Leave your girlfriend behind
♫ Leona Naess</sub>

love, it blinds and it stings

Food Pyramid, originally uploaded by lunchbreath.

Really?

I went by the booth with the government's food pyramid and asked what they thought about it. Their answer? "Um... We're just volunteers. I don't know. Call this lady. [handing me a business card] She'll know."

So, it's apparently very complicated.

News to me:
Fruit roll-ups and chips are healthy.
They must be to have their own table at this health fair.
*shrug*

<sub>You've been my queen for longer than you know
My love for you has been
Every step i take
Every day i live
Everything i see

And if i get things wrong
Don't want you to think I'm running away
But i heard from Jo about this guy And i want to know

What did he say?
He called me baby, baby all night long
What did he do?
He called me baby, baby all night long

Why? Why? Why, did you need him?
Where was i?
Just how close to you is he?
Every smile you gave
Every touch you made
Every word you said

And it hurts beyond hurt
It was a love that blinds
And a love that stings
♫ One eskimO</sub>

stupid and very wrong move

pain, originally uploaded by Jane Bird.

OWCH!!

Dammit. I am incredibly sore.

So much so that I am unable to reposition myself without groaning and David can attest to that. While attempting a lovely ichat conversation, I periodically groaned and griped about the pain I inflicted upon myself.

I need to take better care of my body.

Blues lesson: + $55
New phone: - $36.56
Dinner with Alicia: - $20 <-- EEK!
The day's outcome: - $1.56

... At least I had that $55.

well, i showed up for class

dancers, originally uploaded by jwlphotography.

It's too bad no one else did!!

Out of the seventeen students enrolled,
FOUR showed up to class today.
Tech weeks suck.

Up note: great class with Alicia and fabulous party at Dana's.
I KILLED HER AT BEER PONG!! ... first time :)

it's back to work for me

bored at work, originally uploaded by jwlphotography.

Gosh... I hate this job.

Side note:
I spent at least two hours at AT&T looking at new phones.
I didn't buy anything.
Once home, I watched Lost...

EPIC!!!

oh... I should mention that I love NPH.
Glee was amazing last night.

wish my teeth were all fixed

Day 28: Does a body good!, originally uploaded by perkyNbLue.

Have I mentioned that I hate the dentist.
I should have.
Cuz I do.

Got new shoes though.

And I'm trying out the whole to-do list thing.

again, the countdown begins

2 Weeks, originally uploaded by *Zara.

Just two and a half more weeks.

Mer.

sunday was a very good day

Garden Party, originally uploaded by David Shackelford.

You can take my word for it.

another day, just me and you

Me & You Show Sign, originally uploaded by marchorowitz.

Amanda and Beamer spent the day elsewhere,
while David and I, again, chose to rest.

mm... rest.

Followed up by some house party dance time!

:)

it's that time of year again

Birthday Girl, originally uploaded by David Shackelford.

Happy
Birthday
to
ME!!

What a glorious day
spent with Big, Lauren,
Candace, Amanda, David,
and the rest of the boys!!

I'm so lucky.

And the dancing wasn't too bad neither.

we went for beer. . . bbiab

Cold Beer, originally uploaded by David Shackelford.

Crappy work situation.
Good beer.
Great company.
And overall, a pleasant day.

we stayed in all day long

Day 54: All we can do, originally uploaded by viva la vibs.

Movies and television shows.

Do you need much more?

it's the rhythm of my heart

Swing @ York, originally uploaded by indoloony.

We danced absolutely everywhere today... So much so that we couldn't even go out dancing tonight. It was certainly worth it and we hope to get out to more venues later on in the week. Either way, it'll be a good time! :)

<sub>Can't explain all the feelings that you're making me feel
My heart's in overdrive and you're behind the steering wheel

Touching you, touching me
touching you, God, you're touching me

I believe in a thing called love
Just listen to the rhythm of my heart
There's a chance we could make it now
We'll be rocking 'til the sun goes down
I believe in a thing called love
Ooh!

I wanna kiss you every minute, every hour, every day
You got me in a spin but everythin' is A.OK!

Touching you, touching me
touching you, God, you're touching me!!
♫ The Darkness</sub>

i see you still believe in me

spear street, originally uploaded by telmo32.

I shall see you soon,
dance in your streets,
eat from your kitchens,
smile at your friends,
and enjoy all you offer.

You're just three hours away.

<sub>I try hard to be more
What you want me to be
But I can't help how I act
When you're not here with me

I try hard to be strong
But sometimes I fail myself
And after all I've promised you
So faithfully

You still believe in me

I wanna cry...
♫ The Beach Boys</sub>

lift your hearts & sing to me

together, originally uploaded by Little Starling Photography by Lauri.

Mom, I love you.
Thank you for all you do for me!
You are a wonderful woman.
A great role-model.
And a fantastic friend.
Thank you!

<sub>Let's all get up and dance to a song
That was a hit before your mother was born.
Though she was born a long, long time ago
Your mother should know (Your mother should...)
Your mother should know (...know)

Lift up your hearts and sing me a song
That was a hit before your mother was born.
Though she was born a long, long time ago
Your mother should know (Your mother should...)
Your mother should know (Aaaah)
Your mother should know (Your mother should...)
Your mother should know (Aaaah)

Sing it again.
Da-da-da-da...
♫ The Beatles</sub>

when i touch you, i feel happy

TRIUMPH!, originally uploaded by D_m_i_t_r_y.

After a long morning of picking up trash, I got to clean up and dress up for the sorority banquet. I'm excited to be dressed in my best vintage attire and spending the night with my lovely Randoms! It's been a freaking fantastic week thus far and I see that it's only getting better by the moment. :)

<sub>oh please say to me
you'll let me be your man
and please say to me
you'll let me hold your hand

now let me hold your hand
i wanna hold your hand

and when i touch you, i feel happy inside
it's such a feeling that my love, i can't hide
i can't hide
i can't hide

yeah you
you got that something
i think you'll understand
when i feel that something
i wanna hold your hand
♫ The Beatles</sub>

limitless undying love shines

happiness, originally uploaded by Ivan Pires.

It's been a good day today. A lazy day. And I can't wait to see David in just three days. I almost don't believe that I'll be seeing him again and although it felt like the time dragged on, now I can hardly remember what happened during the time in between. Mm... Monday night...

As for tonight, it's time for a birthday blues party at Blue Bella! I am SO looking forward to it and I'm even giving a private lesson just before. I don't have anything in particular to work on with him for this first session, but hopefully, I'll have a better idea after tonight. :)

<sub>Images of broken light which
dance before me like a million eyes
That call me on and on across the universe
Thoughts meander like a
restless wind inside a letter box
they tumble blindly as
they make their way across the universe

Jai guru deva om
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world

Sounds of laughter shades of life
are ringing through my open ears
exciting and inviting me
Limitless undying love which
shines around me like a million suns
It calls me on and on across the universe
♫ The Beatles</sub>

i say high... you say low

, originally uploaded by Krisztina Tordai.

Eyes are finally feeling better. And I'm so glad. It's been FAR too long. Going in for an eye check-up. Taking my car in for the burnt out headlight. Grabbing a bit to eat. Teaching my CYT kids. Going to Alicia Milo's class. Rocking out at Mark's show. It should be a wonderful day!

<sub>You say yes, I say no
You say stop and I say go, go, go
Oh, no
You say goodbye and I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye
I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye
I say hello

I say high, you say low
You say why, and I say I don't know
Oh, no
You say goodbye and I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye
I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye
I say hello

Why, why, why, why, why, why
Do you say good bye
Goodbye, bye, bye, bye, bye
♫ The Beatles</sub>

i don't need no other lover

wednesday, originally uploaded by rhirhian.

Hm... It was definitely an odd night of dancing last night. I don't understand it, but somehow, even with my texts earlier in the day, it was hardly the normal turn-out. There were very few leads and I sat out on a ton of songs because of it. It really wouldn't have mattered later in the night, because I had several birthday drinks and shots, but that was not the case.

The birthday jam wasn't as lively as it has been in the past, but it was still a lot of fun. Due to the small turn-out, I danced with all the leads two, if not three, times during the jam. I hope more people will turn up at the Firehouse tonight. I want a real San Diego lindy hop birthday jam!!

Oh, and in case you were wondering... no, I'm not too hungover this morning. :)

<sub>Something in the way she moves
Attracts me like no other lover
Something in the way she woos me

I don't want to leave her now
You know I believe and how

Somewhere in her smile she knows
That I don't need no other lover
Something in her style that shows me

I don't want to leave her now
You know I believe and how

You're asking me will my love grow
I don't know, I don't know
You stick around now it may show
I don't know, I don't know
♫ The Beatles</sub>

i'll just dream of him tonight

tuesday, originally uploaded by rhirhian.

This is not a night to stay in and read a book or two.
I'm pumped about Henry's Pub tonight.
I have arranged for a ride to and from the venue,
so I won't have to worry about taking the time
to sober up for the drive home.
I apologize in advance...
for any texts you may receive...
Happy Birthday to me!! :D

<sub>I've just seen a face,
I can't forget the time or place
That we'd just met, she's just the girl for me
And I want all the world to see we've met
Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm mmm mmm

Had it been another day
I might have looked the other way
But I had never been aware
And as it is I dream of her tonight
La, di, di, da di di

Falling, yes I am falling
And she keeps calling me back again

I have never known
The likes of this, I've been alone
And I have missed things and kept out of sight
But other girls were never quite like this
Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm mmm mmm
♫ The Beatles</sub>

obladi oblada, life goes on

monday, originally uploaded by rhirhian.

Monday, you don't suck as hard as you may think.

My day was pretty effing fantastic. I went to two jobs and then out to dance the night away. I drank away $15 and lindy hopped pretty damn hard. I even had to sit in my car for a while before I was comfortable driving home. All in all, wonderful night, wonderful people, wonderful dancing.

I can hardly wait until tomorrow.

<sub>Desmond has a barrow in the market place
Molly is the singer in a band
Desmond says to Molly - girl I like your face
And Molly says this as she takes him by the hand

Obladi oblada, life goes on, bra
Lala how the life goes on
Obladi oblada, life goes on, bra
La la, how the life goes on

Desmond takes a trolly to the jewellers stores
Buys a twenty carat golden ring
Takes it back to Molly waiting at the door
And as he gives it to her she begins to sing

Obladi oblada, life goes on, bra
La la, how the life goes on
♫ The Beatles</sub>

tried to cut me down to size

yo! sunday, originally uploaded by rhirhian.

What a busy day...

I spent the day running around to the last Frippleville performance of the season and immediately to the Ciao Bella set, to help Greg with his film. It was a fun experience, but I don't feel as if I understand anymore about film after all of that. He was appreciative of my help, so I chalk it up to a good time.

Since I only got three hours of sleep after dancing last night, I returned home and relaxed the rest of the night. The spa has never felt so damned good!! Starting tomorrow, I will be running around like crazy, to the various dance venues to celebrate my birthday. I'm excited! :D

<sub>Oh, how you tried to cut me down to size
Telling dirty lies to my friends
But my own father said, 'give her up, don't bother
The world isn't coming to an end'

(he said just) Walk like a man
Talk like a man
Walk like a man, my son
No woman's worth
Crawling on the earth
Just walk like a man, my son
♫ Jersey Boys</sub>

i wanna go swim in your eyes

hello saturday, originally uploaded by rhirhian.

To Evan and all the people who attended Underground Blues:

Thank you so much for one of my most enjoyable nights of dancing. The energy, in and of itself, exceeded the norm a hundred times over. Thank you for welcoming me into the group and treating me as one of you.

It was a rough day up to the point of the concert and it turned immediately as I saw all of you lighting up the stage in concert! I feel priviledged to have shared in the Alumni Night, of all nights, and I hope to come back up, if I ever get another free weekend.

Thanks again! :)

<sub>well you're my green eyed girl and i been running around with you
its the afternoon and we got nothing left to do
so wipe the dirt off, take your shirt off
and we should go hit the cantina; we got work off

i said its hot outside let me go swimming in your eyes
we been running for awhile why don't you lay down i'll make you smile
i could never ask for nothing better than this
it's just tequila and the beach, it's quite salty when we kiss

i said i think that we can stay here
cuz i feel our time has come
and we can walk down to the ocean
and sit with the rising sun
so unpack your bags this instant
no more running from town to town
and now that we've arrived so safely
baby you can lay me down
♫ Dirty Heads</sub>

more than love at first sight

friday, originally uploaded by rhirhian.

Last night was an odd night... Great classes, awkward dance party, and a fantastic night of conversation with Christian! We sat in Denny's talking about anything and everything, until 5:30 in the morning. We talked about Christian's wife, my David, and all of the random things that we have in common. I look forward to the next time I can hang out with Christian.

<sub>I want a Sunday kind of love
A love to last past Saturday night
And I'd like to know it's more than love at first sight
And I want a Sunday kind of love
Oh yea yea

I want a a love that's on the square
Can't seem to find somebody
Someone to care
And I'm on a lonely road that leads to no where
I need a Sunday kind of love
♫ Christina Aguilera</sub>

i want the touch of your hand

thursday, originally uploaded by rhirhian.

I'm off to meet with a boss, teach a class, take a dance class, and then dance at a brand new venue. I'm FINALLY busy, even though my day didn't begin until 3 pm!! Yay!

p.s. I'm completely smitten and SO happy about it! :)

p.p.s. Check out THIS amazing gem!! Mm... it's comic greatness!! *drool*

<sub>Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah!
Roma-Roma-ma-ah!
Ga-ga-ooh-la-la!
Want your bad romance

I want your ugly
I want your disease
I want your everything
As long as it’s free
I want your love
Love, love, love
I want your love

I want your drama
The touch of your hand
I want you leather studded kiss in the scene
And I want your love
Love, love, love
I want your love
Love, love, love
I want your love

You know that I want you
And you know that I need you
I want a bad, your bad romance

I want your loving
And I want your revenge
You and me could write a bad romance
I want your loving
All your love is revenge
You and me could write a bad romance
♫ Lady GaGa</sub>

o, my feet, they always bleed

mermaid, originally uploaded by Krisztina Tordai.

While waiting for my dentist appointment yesterday, I read a Hans Christian Andersen fairy tale on my iPod. The Little Mermaid. I have always enjoyed and will continue to enjoy the intricacies of children's literature. The decisions made by authors were written to keep children in line. To encourage them to make the choices deemed correct and to always respect their elders.

The story was actually pretty closely followed by Disney's animators for the movie The Little Mermaid, with the exception of the ending and a few omitted details. Disney is the land where dreams come true and because of that, children very rarely face difficult choices or unwanted circumstance, when watching Disney movies.

Critical thinking must be nurtured from an early age. Of course, CT will look much different for a seven-year-old, compared to a high school senior, but both deserve the chance to stretch the muscles in the hopes of becoming stronger.

Many parents and educators read to their children and ask questions throughout the story. You are correct to state that this is one of the best ways to encourage critical thinking with younger ages. However, you're probably doing it wrong.

The Disney version: girl wants boy, girl warily seeks solution, easy solution offered, small sacrifice is made, girl fails, dad saves her, happily ever after.
Anderson's version: girl wants boy, girl eagerly seeks solution, extreme and difficult solutions are offered, death is sacrificed, girl is about to fail, given opportunity to betray boy for her life, fails again and dies

When the choices offered to children are heavily weighted on one side, what decision-making skills are they really implementing? Everyday we are faced with decisions that need to be made, which do not read as right or wrong. Our children should face the same tasks as well.

In the original version of this story, the Little Mermaid (who has yet to be name Ariel) chooses to drink the potion which splits her tail into two legs, only to feel the pain of walking on knives with each step. The Sea Witch does take her ability to talk, but she does so by cutting off her tongue.

Now there's a choice to make: healthy, safe, but horribly lovesick OR dumb, in pain, at risk of death, but a chance at love. It sounds borderline cruel to ask a child what decision they would make, but why is it so? You are not actually making them choose between the two. This is a hypothetical, made up world, in which the child should feel the freedom to make his or her own decisions, without the restrictions of right or wrong. Those two words shouldn't have precedence in critical thinking.

If the only questions you ask all have easy answers, you are breeding sheep, who will only learn to fall in line. Teach your children to think and lead the flock instead.

<sub>I'm a mermaid
but I've sold my voice
for a couple of feet
and they always bleed
when I go walking in the road

I'm a mermaid
but I've sold my voice
for a couple of feet
and they always bleed
when I go walking in these streets

and I once saw a most beautiful man
at the local record store
he bumped into me and said,
well excuse me, young ma'am,
but haven't I seen your pretty eyes somewhere before?
I smiled but gestured at my throat
to show that I was mute
well, he quickly looked down at the floor
and shuffled in his boots
he was out of there so fast

I'm a mermaid
but I've sold my voice
♫ Regina Spektor</sub>

yer beard... yer beard is good

twohundred and sixtytwo., originally uploaded by atomic turquoise.

I had an entirely different post for today. I began writing it out, got about half way, and decided to save it for tomorrow. I just feel far too conflicted about other things.

This long distance relationship is awkward, unfamiliar, and altogether awful. Set aside the times when David seems unreal -- due to like-mindedness, sincerity, acceptance, and all-encompassing sex-appeal (you may blush now) -- as I still feel it is often the case... the thing distance does to torture and betray me is to mislead me into believing things that are untrue or unproven either way.

It's easy for me to believe that I care about this wonderful man, who I often talk to, via phone or webcam. But when I think about his life and how I fit into it, it's nearly impossible for me to believe. The biggest problem for me is that I normally receive the bulk of my validation through physical contact. The distance has forced me to adapt and I am fairly capable of surviving a few days with several texts and an occasional call.

But with each day, a little bit more of the reality is stripped away. It felt real (as real as it could) for quite a long time. I guess everything comes back around at some point. Two weeks from now, it won't matter. I'll be in his arms, dancing to the same song, holding his hand, clinging to each moment we get together. It's hard to be excited when it's still today... and weeks away from touching his face.

I'm fine, really. I just hate when the realities of life make everything feel unreal. I also hope this feeling that I am somehow a nuisance will fade. It's just in my head. I'm working on it.

<sub>Your beard is good.
It's just a compliment for you.
You're beard..
Just a compliment about your beard being good.
And also I have another one here...
You're good at finding shortcuts around this part of town.
Would it be gay to write you a song to cheer you up?
It's called, "Bret, You Got it Going On."

Hey there Bret, I see you looking down.
Don't want to see my little buddy there with a frown.
Just because I get more women than you, well that's only because they don't know you like I do.
Sure, you're weedy and kind of shy.
But some girlie out there must be needy for a weedy, shy guy.
They want you as the needle when they're rolling in the hay.
Just hear me out when I say...

Bret, you got it going on.
The ladies will get to know your sexuality
When they get to know your personality.
I said, Bret, you got it going on.
Not in a gay way, just in a "hey mate.
I wanted to say that you're looking okay, mate."
Why can't a heterosexual guy,
Tell a heterosexual guy that he thinks his booty is fly.
Not all the time, obviously
Just when he's got a problem with his self esteem.
Don't let anybody tell you you're not humpable.
Because you're bumpable.
Well, I hope this doesn't make you feel uncomfortable.
If I say you've got a boom ow-ow.
Come on Bret, help me out now.

Bret, you got it going on.
(You got it going on!)
That's the conclusion that I've come to.
But that doesn't mean that I want to bum you.
Bret, you got it going on.
(Got it going on...)
No doubt about it, we'd be gettin crazy.
If one of us was lucky enough to be born a lady.
♫ Flight of the Conchords</sub>

never gonna say goodbye

(RED), originally uploaded by *Zara.

T
W
O

W
E
E
K
S
.
.
.

I feel as if I might just start counting the hours. I hope these next two weeks pass as quickly as it did the last time around. I really can't wait to see all of my Bay Area lovers... Big, WIll, James, Lauren (I hope), and David!! You can just know I'm thinking about you and hopefully that will hold you over. :)

<sub>We're no strangers to love
You know the rules and so do I
A full commitment's what I'm thinking of
You wouldn't get this from any other guy
I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling
Gotta make you understand

Never gonna give you up,
Never gonna let you down,
Never gonna run around and desert you,
Never gonna make you cry,
Never gonna say goodbye,
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you


We've known each other for so long
Your heart's been aching but you're too shy to say it
Inside we both know what's been going on
We know the game and we're gonna play it

I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling
Gotta make you understand
♫ Rick Astley</sub>

cooking to do on their own

Sculpting Hands, originally uploaded by Josh Sommers.

I want to get my hands dirty again. Creating. Inventing. Dissecting an idea and making it into something tangible. I miss it dearly. I need to find the time for it... eventually, I will. For now, however, it's time to take a dip in the spa... After which, I need to write up a parent letter and get it sent out and edit the instrumental music that I was able to find in order to make the CDs for tomorrow's class. Mer.

<sub>And don´t be afraid of the Big Bad Wolf
he´s just a sheep underneath those teeth
And don´t be afraid of the Wicked Witch
She ain´t so bad she ain´t no bitch

Woo ooo it´s a wicked wicked world
Yea-a-a-ah Woo ooo ooo ooo it´s a wicked world

La-la-la-ladies if you feel me holler
Fellas show us all a dollar

Little Riding Hood is such a flirt
She got Miss Muffet all up her skirt
Hansel and Gretel never made it home
They got some cooking to do of their own

Woo ooo it´s a wicked wicked world
Yea-a-a-ah Woo ooo ooo ooo it´s a wicked world

Once I tried to be so good
All sweet and spice like good girls should
But I don´t see why I try why do I try?
When every time I climb that hill
My Jack is somewhere chasing Jill
♫ Laura Jansen</sub>