2007 blessings

* Happy New Year .., originally uploaded by P e ® s o n.

So I have sat here for about a half an hour, if not more, just trying to decide on the photo to use for this blog. I almost used a cheesy "Happy New Year" with roses or I could have used a shot of someone writing their resolutions... but it all just wasn't right. Tomorrow my post will be about CHANGE and I will hopefully have the time to write out the many things that I journaled about last night. I don't want to make resolutions or write out things that I will most likely despise or ignore within 21 days. I am excited that I am ending this year so strong and I can't wait to start the new year. I even have a book with the guidelines on how to eat fast-food and restaurant food in a somewhat healthy or nutritious way! (I know, you're jealous) Anyways... I pray that everyone will experience some sort of movement in this coming year. I hope that you feel a stirring from the inside and set out to change the world around you for the better. Every small step makes a difference. You might not start out with the speed of a runner, but any change can set you up for bigger things in the following years! I love you all. I look forward to reading more about you, learning more about you, and hopefully, spending more time with all of you!!

All my love and God's blessings...
2007 is all tied up and I'm ready for 2008's Happy New Year!

it's like a cow's opinion

365:96 Moo Point, originally uploaded by angelsk.

Lauren has a Moo-Cow.

Ha!

she's goin' to the pasture and she's gunna get married

The hills are alive, originally uploaded by hebedesign.

"Ecstatic!

Thoughts
Uncontrollably
Sporadic!

Yet centered around One center

Joy.

In plush ripe tones
Joy is rushing through my Bones!

If Joy were a Color
It would be Purple
Pastel
Pretty.

Like old women and young children
Both wear on Easter,

Smiling while having deviled eggs
And drinking Kool-Aid,

Chasing blown Bubbles
In the backyard.

The young ones' distracting hats
Fly off...

And the old ones laugh
A Contagious laughter
That is to be shared
By everyone there!

The Sun
Shines down upon them
As all of their Physical Imperfections
Gleam
Beautifully.

And inside
Inside here
I feel like this
And I look outside my window
And imagine the
Future Purple Pastel Pretty
Moments of Joy
That I will one day have with my Wife.
And my Children.
My Friends.
And my Family.

I really look forward to Those Moments.
But I am Thankful for the one
That I am having Right Now.
This morning.

Alone.
On my couch.

Overwhelmed.
By Joy."

- Bradley Hathaway

night crawler

Amtrak at Night, originally uploaded by Matt (mistergoleta).

I got into the Fresno Amtrak station early this morning... about 6:45am. We left San Diego at 10pm. I can't say that I got much sleep and it's not at all helpful that I am still sick. Oh well. Lauren and I are holding up the fort... for the most part.

Pray for us. And pray for Lauren especially.
Pray for her peace of mind. And pray that the wedding plans fall into place. We want God to be in total control and we need all the help in praying that we can get. For those of you who end up praying, even a small prayer, our hearts go out to you and thank you immensely!

I hope everyone is enjoy their Friday.
Love and God bless.

sickening

Sick, originally uploaded by ghindo.

I'm sick.
I hate it.
I have nothing else to say.


other than... I'm leaving for Fresno in 3 hours!

maid of honor duties

Bridesmaid, originally uploaded by Rohan Phillips.

So we picked out the dresses today.
They're gorgeous...
And oddly enough, we found one kind of dress that fits us all well!
Strapless, floor-length, rouged to the side, and PINK!!
I guess the technical name for the color is Watermelon... but it's pink.

I'm so glad that we were able to accomplish that task.
One more bridesmaid needs to be sized and then we're done.
I wonder what shoes we'll end up buying...

Good day.
David's Bridal is pretty sweet.
Original Mock-up for the Wedding

i'm a tangled mess

Not Quite Candle Light, originally uploaded by vania_b.

So Dana's over it, I guess.
I just was a bit overwhelmed when I wrote my last post.
I think my thoughts are sorted a bit better now.

It was a really fantastic holiday!

I'm a bit bummed that we didn't pray over the food as a family, but that's what happens when we eat a casual lunch instead of the normal dinner. The time I got to spend with Lauren and Dayna was amazing and we played dominoes for so long that I could hardly think straight anymore. However, I was still the WINNER of the whole game!!

I had a Very Merry Christmas, did you?!

it's christmas

Aftermath, originally uploaded by The Eye of Brad.

I kinda ruined Christmas.

I was so excited about giving my sister her gift...
We worked very hard on a gift for our mom...
Dana and I fought...
Mom loved the gift...
We were supposed to get Dad a gift together...
I looked for the gift, but Dana got her own...
I didn't find the gift...
I asked for her to include me and I bought some beer to add...
The bad part: I didn't tell Dana that I got Mom another gift...
She didn't know till I handed it to Mom and I made her feel awful...
So she cried...

I feel awful.
I'm really not enjoying myself anymore.
I feel like I let her down.
This sucks.

happy christmas

merry christmas!, originally uploaded by anzyAprico.

I pray that your day is spent with loved ones.

That you can enjoy the festive events.

And experience the blessing that is Christ, our Savior.


♥
♥ ♥
♥ ♥ ♥

merry christmas eve

., originally uploaded by sakura*aya.

I hope everyone has a great day today.


This has been an amazing weekend and I'm just more excited for the week ahead! I can't wait for the candlelight service tonight.

...and Christmas TOMORROW!!



Check it!

welcome wreath

sleigh bells, originally uploaded by SpacePotato.

It's the smallest wreath I've ever seen and it brings an incredible amount of joy to my life each and every day! I am very excited about the Christmas season this year and I hope that I am able to keep dancing throughout this next semester. It has lifted me out of a funk that I didn't realize I was in.

I'm planning on meeting with my mom today and then getting together with my sister to figure out some last minute details. The plan was to sleep in since I didn't have to work FloodKids this morning and was up past 4am... Alas, a call from my aunt at 10:15am woke me up and I haven't been able to fall asleep since. So I'm cozy on my couch wrapped in a quilt and typing with the TV humming in the background. I dozed off for a few seconds and received a text. So I'm up. Next step: putting my quilt back on the bed and getting out the door.

I'm tired.
I'm thirsty.
And I'm a bit dizzy.

Have a great Sunday everyone!

the christmas angel says 'merry christmas'

Don't Talk About Our Son, Martha, originally uploaded by gregeichelberger.

The show was great.
The company was perfect.
The 'afterward' was just awesome.

I am so glad that Veronica convinced me of everything.
Thank you, Veronica. You're super smart!
And now, I play the waiting game.

Yeah!!

it's a CCT christmas

Lockettes, originally uploaded by gregeichelberger.

And Veronica and I will be there!!

I can't wait to go to see Traditions tomorrow.
It has nothing to do with the beautiful "lockettes."
Nothing to do with the cute boy, of whom I have a crush.
And nothing to do with the cheaper seats we got.

But it has EVERYTHING to do with the HOT CHICK I'm going with!!
Love you Veronica and I'll see you tomorrow.


*** As for today, I'm getting back on the horse and going to try me hand at swing dancing again. Atomic Ballroom, here I come!

feeling a bit lost

Looking at the Map, originally uploaded by perkyNbLue.

I don't know quite how I got here
And I don't know how to get out just yet
I'll just stay here and count the days as they pass
Is it odd that I feel like I'm missing them all?

So this is me saying that I give it to God.
I'm giving it all up:

The worrying. The stress. The indecisiveness.
The insecurities. The self-pity. The jealousy.

I don't need it. And I don't want it. So take it!

chucks are my swing shoes

Dip, originally uploaded by sjl7678.

I danced all night
And grooved to the tunes
I forgot all else
Nothing to do but move

Chucks squeak on the floor
A strong hand guides my way
I hold my arms strong
As we swing and we sway

I don't want it to end
My feet just never seem to stop
A sudden and perfect dip
And I could just drop


Can't wait to dance tomorrow... although I'm sore from last night.

when I dip, you dip

Revolution Prelims, originally uploaded by Swifty.

I'm going swing dancing tonight...
And I'm super excited!!

It's not everyday that I get to go out to a Pub...
With my Big and my Best, Loox.

I hope all ya'll are having a nice night.
Stay safe!

christmas: almost here

christmas fruit, originally uploaded by faeriewings1.

My excitement just grows more and more as Christmas draws near! I am having a blast decorating our apartment and putting together the last of my Christmas gifts. It's amazing and I'm so glad I'll still be going up to Fresno to help Lauren out with the wedding! I'm just glad that classes are over and that I can relax for a change.


So Merry almost Christmas.
yeah!

several days watching the tube

great nite in, originally uploaded by SpacePotato.

Haiku for My Winter Vaca:

No classes for me
I am just waiting for grades
So movies I'll watch

signing surprise

Surprise!, originally uploaded by Penelope's Loom.

I miss sign language and I hope I get to do it again. As for now, I just need to get through my required classes and hopefully, the opportunity will arise. I feel like I get the same amount of excitement from signing as this little girl does.

So allow me to SURPRISE you all and say...

I love you!, originally uploaded by tweaker73.

sleigh bells are ringing

candy canes, originally uploaded by SpacePotato.

I'm so glad I can just focus on the Christmas holiday!


YEAH!!

praise God

Day 9!, originally uploaded by .rach..

He got me through Finals.

I know that stressed more than was necessary, but I got through it and that's what matters. I just have to rewrite one more paper and get it in by noon tomorrow to raise a grade, but otherwise I'm done!! I'm so stoked. And I'm so TIRED! So I'm going to take a shower and pray that wakes me up. I want to just enjoy tonight. Man, Finals stink.

♥♥♥

date night

Candace at Lunch, originally uploaded by perkyNbLue.

The best thing about my finals week:

My date with Candace.


I had a few breakdowns today, but at least I got to spend time with my best friend one-on-one. I love when we're able to set aside time just for us. It's the best!

driven

2 goals for the last month of 2007: Tie loose ends and get organized.
- finish finals with the strength from GOD, because I don't have it
- finish the reading in my Year Bible so I can give it to my mom for the New Year
- go through apartment, finish unpacking, and put things in their place (including the pictures that still need hanging)
- set up my life calendar before the New Year

Goals for the year 2008:
- write down "intentions" for each week so I can work towards something worthwhile, rather than getting bogged down by the have-to's and should-do's
- keep Lauren sane for her wedding
- graduate

Hopes:
- that I might discover God's plan for me as a single woman
- that I am able to positively influence the lives of people I come into contact with

pit of the peach

James and the Giant Peach, originally uploaded by me.

Remember when homework was interesting, creative, and fun?
Remember when it was something you actually looked forward to?
Remember when all you had to show was the finishing product?

What happened to THAT?

I miss it.
I miss doing things like drawing and creating and playing...
... WITHOUT feeling guilty!!


Now, back to reality and writing papers for finals.

cold beer?

Cold Beer, originally uploaded by Beauty fer Ashes.

She isn't doing too much work
She's not too far along
She is however chatting up
A chum, a future beau?

chalk drawings

chalklove!, originally uploaded by becaboo.

I am run-down, anxious, sleep-deprived, and totally stoked on God! I spent a ton of time in my Bible and got to work with FloodKids twice. I have such a hard time seeing these things as opportunities as I'm doing them even though I know they are. I am excited to see the kids perform during service next week. At least at that time I should have my life back in order, or at least I hope! I cannot wait till finals are through!!

God, be my strength and my shield as I try to praise you with my diligence and hard work. Amen.

anxiety takes over

peace, originally uploaded by becaboo.

Have you ever felt so utterly consumed with anxiety that your heart literally beats out of your chest, your lungs feel tight, and your muscles tighten and twitch slightly. I feel that. I hate that feeling. The reason for the feeling is random and uncalled for so dwelling on it will only add to the foolishness.

So as I have been wanting to do for a long time, my plan is to lock myself in my room for a good while to just focus on God, His word, His love, His strength, His grace, and mostly importantly right now, His PEACE!

As they say, "No Jesus, no peace. Know Jesus, know peace."

flappers

flappers, originally uploaded by perkyNbLue.

Goal: to recreate this picture tonight!!

be still

, originally uploaded by lovegaby.

I am so excited about reading the books I bought today! I've turned into a total nerd and I'm not sure if I'm so ashamed of it... I'm in awe of God's amazing grace and love. I hope I am able to be still and listen to Him this weekend as I work towards the training for small group leaders this Sunday. I desperately want to continue to give back to my community in any way I can... I think Flood College is my chance to do so. I'm stoked and God's my rock!

serenity

yay i went to the beach!, originally uploaded by becaboo.

With haste I run from one thing to the next
All the while becoming more tired and perplexed
I reach for the tunnel's ending bright light
As the clock ticks down and day turns to night

One thing I'm forgetting, one thing I've been missing
I discovered suddenly as I began reminiscing
In the past, when I was feeling sad and alone
God was the one to bring me back home

He is the answer and the only true key
He knows what I want and who I need to be
With sincerity and love, He carries my load
As He directs my way along this serene road

(not my best, but the first version was deleted)

anxiously awaiting

Omaggio ad agedsenator, originally uploaded by danydrs72.

I have the computer show in the background...
And I should be getting the one in the foreground.
I simply cannot wait!

It WILL be amazing...

No rebuttal!!

sinking

|Into the Abyss|, originally uploaded by *JBR_JBR.

Overwhelmed
I'm sinking
I can but hardly breathe

Hands are shaking
My confidence fading
And I'm searching for the "out"

If you find it, let me know
I need a remedy quick
Sicknesses overwhelming me

One more assignment
A few more awkward moments
Until I may retire for the night

I'll be diligent
Get things done quick
Just to spend time with You...

I need You...
Just You.
Now.

my hope

Psalm 46:10, originally uploaded by lovegaby.

O, how I miss thee...

Let me count the ways!


Still doing the first Chem Lab that's due tomorrow.
I'd rather be conversing with God!

caffeinated study sesh

John 14:27, originally uploaded by i am a mermaid princess..

I thought this was extremely appropriate with finals just around the corner. I am already done with one of my classes and I have a few more assignments and exams for the others.
I really need to buckle down for Chemistry.

Things I still have left to do:
- - - Chem Lab 1 (monday night)
- - - Eng A Paper (wednesday afternoon)
- - - Eng W Final Paper (next wednesday morning)
- - - Eng A Final Exam (next wednesday afternoon)
- - - Chem Lab 2 (tuesday evening)
- - - Chem Extra Credit
- - - Chem Final Exam (next wednesday evening)
- - - Math Final Exam (next thursday afternoon)
- - - Eng A Paper Rewrite (by next friday afternoon)
He'll give me strength
He'll give me peace
He'll give me direction
He'll put all at ease
-- by photographer

my bleeding heart

Dicentra spectabilis, originally uploaded by ngawangchodron.

"It is at the edge of a petal that love waits."
- William Carlos Williams

---

I wore my heart on my sleeve
Can't remember where it all led me.
But I remember the breakups,
Make-ups,
The everywhere and in between.

I struggled to fall asleep some nights,
Trying to relive those moments.
But now I have found friends,
Hope,
And the Love I'll always need.

Guide my heart through these next few years,
As I see my friends become spouses.
Lead me to find my purpose,
Peace,
And patience, as I wait for the man of my dreams.

---

"Write it on your heart that every day is the best day of the year."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

elated erasers

LOL., originally uploaded by becaboo.

Today was a good day and it was a bit sad to say goodbye to the kidlets... However, I'm very glad that I am done waking up early to simply cook for and clean up after the lil' guys.

I've been feeling really inspired lately... I will hopefully be receiving the macBook for Christmas (and probably pay for part of it), and once I have it, I can upload my photos from my phone, to my computer, and to the internet. With that I might be able to start my own photo blogs! I love the photos I'm finding online in the meantime. On that note, I'm going to get back to it.

♥ Lauren

poopie-be-gone

So it's official. Tomorrow is my last day at the YMCA Preschool, and I'd be lying if I said that I was anything less than stoked!! I am glad I got the experience, but I'm even happier that I'm done. I look forward to more time with God, a more peaceful sleep, and way more time to connect with the people in my life! I'm excited for all the "Winter Break" brings: family, friends, and the holidays.

Time for bed.
I have to get up for work in the morning.


Peace.

the tree

Prayer from Flood:

Slow me down, Lord.
Ease the pounding of my heart by quieting of my mind.
Steady my hurried pace with a vision of the eternal reach of time.
Give me, amid the confusion of the day, the calmness of the everlasting hills.
Break the tension of my nerves and muscles with the soothing music of the singing streams that live in my memory.
Teach me the art of taking minute vacations--of slowing down to look at a flower, to chat with a friend, to pat a dog, to smile at a child, to read a few lines from a good book.
Slow me down, Lord, and inspire me to send my roots deep into the soil of life's enduring values, that I may grow toward my greater destiny.
Remind me each day that the race is not always to the swift; that there is more to life than increasing its speed.
Let me look upward to the towering oak and know that it grew great and strong because it grew slowly and well.

Colossians 2:6-7
"So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in Him, rooted and built up in Him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness."

late night/early morning coffee

Here's the dilemma:
I'm sitting in Lestat's with my best friend.
Slowly, I'm starting to get sleepy.
I don't know how much longer we will be out.
If I drink more caffeine now, I'll be up for a while longer.


Here's my decision:
Diet soda.


I am so glad that Lauren was able to come down from Fresno. I'm very glad that we got to just hang out and watch movies with Tommy. I am excited to see Veronica tomorrow. I look forward to my last theatre presentation on Tuesday... It's going to be stinkin' sweet!! I cannot wait for this stressful and busy semester to end! This is signing off for the night.

God is good.

my new love

This show is hilarious and oh-so-dramatic!! Love it.

eat pray love

he's so funny

I ♥ Pearl.

upside down

I am currently lying on my back, exhausted, drained, and slowly losing consciousness. While doing this, I thought, "why not write a blog upside down?" So that is what I'm doing. I'm writing. I'm upside down. I'm writing upside down. I know that it's nothing profound or all too logical but it appeases me for the time being... Until I need to get up to use the restroom. In which case, I would no longer be upside down. I guess that time is now. So, farewell gorgeous readers.


Genesis 1:26

spring break

I am incredibly blessed with amazing housemates!! I just spent the past two days with two of my housemates, Lux and Chicago. We wanted to get away for a real Spring Break rather than sitting around and doing the homework that is always assigned to ruin the holiday. So, we set out Friday afternoon to Whittier and dropped our stuff at my Aunt Ellen's house before going down to the swing club, Memories. We all took the lessons. While Chicago took the intro class, Lux and I headed up to the second floor and learned the Shim Sham. That was probably my third lesson ever and I enjoyed the fact that we learned something that I wouldn't normally pick up from following!

The dancing was amazing and I definitely went a bit overboard, dancing nearly every song. I could probably last longer if I knew how to pace myself. Until then, I will continue to lie awake the night of dizzy and nauseous. The next morning we got ready, read our Bibles, ate breakfast, and drove up to LA.

We walked around the Fashion District and Lux got a few things before my Big Sis drove down and met us for lunch. Lunch sucked. The food was decent but the service was awful so, we left there pretty fed up with the Fashion District and drove up to Beverly Hills to go to the Beverly Center mall. I got my Banquet dress and enjoyed the fact that there was some Sanrio inspired store there that had Hello Kitty guitars.

After the mall, we drove down to Huntington Beach and met up with Kyle, a friend from swing dancing. The five of us drove down to the pier and ate at Ruby's. The food was good and the service was as well... finally. Dinner was definitely a highlight with random topics, awkward comments, and memorable quotes. This was the perfect way to end the trip of the semester and I couldn't imagine the trip any other way!

Thanks to everyone who was a part of the trip, the fun, the drive, the exhaustion, the shopping, the laughs, the awkwardness, the dancing, the jokes, and the relationships created.

I love you guys.
You're amazing.

oh Jesus, take the wheel

I'm still in a state of disbelief. Last night, I went up to Irvine to dance at the Atomic Ballroom. I was extremely excited to go and confident that driving wouldn't be a problem. Upon getting there, I danced up a storm and didn't even leave until 2:30am. At that point, I was hungry but I was wide awake. When Kyle asked me if I was sure that I was good to drive home, I had no reason to say "no."

So, I got in my car and began to drive, got on the 405 and looked for the 5... Not realizing that they just merge, I call to confirm I was headed in the right direction and kept driving. Soon after that, I started to shiver and turned the heater on low, pointed away from my face... Bad idea. My eyes suddenly got heavy and I could hardly pay attention to the road.

What is my solution? Should I pull over to the side of the road? No, I didn't want to fall asleep on the side of the road and never wake up. Should I stop somewhere to get some caffeine? I would have if I had seen anything open at 2:30 - 3 in the morning!

So, I tried holding one eye open as I drove, which worked for the most part. Depth perception was shot, but otherwise I was able to drive smoothly. It wasn't until I began to shut my eyes without realizing it that it became a problem. Not realizing they were closed, I opened my eyes suddenly and swerved to miss the median I was about 3 inches from. That woke me up, for the time being.

By the end of the drive, I can honestly say that I don't remember half of it... I know God had His hand on me last night and He was the one to keep me safe. Swerving across lanes and nearly crashing 5 times tells me that I am not going to drive anywhere alone unless I have somewhere to stay the night, so I can drive down in the morning.

I was stupid. God was incredibly merciful. I'm forever grateful!

reasons for singleness (happy valentine's day)

Kelsey passed this on because she thought it was good... and she was right. I obviously didn't write it, but I think you should all read it. I love you all and I hope those who are single (or in a relationship, for that matter) will take all of this into consideration while awaiting Valentine's Day. Again, I did not write the following excerpt but I think it's great that anyone is taking the time to address a huge portion of the population... singleness. Read this either way: single, taken, guy, or girl. I love you all and I pray that God blesses your days ahead!!

♥ Lauren. Pebbles.



Reasons for Singleness.


Valentines day is almost upon us, and i know that there will be people who are bummed because they have a gift that they do not desire known as " singleness".
I want to simply give you some encouragment from the bible as to why you are single...and i hope that it will give you hope and strength to wait and not compromise.

The Bible gives us several reasons for singleness. I want to focus on this one today: Eph 5:33 So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband."

The first reason that you are single is this: You have not found the one that you love.

Many guys come to me and tell me that they want a wife. My response is...no, you need to be in love first. But before you fall in love, you need to discover what true love really is. The bookof ephesians tells us that a man must love his wife as Christ loves the church...how will a man know how to love if he is not looking to Christ as his example?
Ladies, Sisters...i would encourage you to find a man that loves God...because only God can teach a man how to love you as he does. Jesus came and died to give us what our greatest need is, and continues to do what is best for us. Men, you will know when you are in love, when you are willing to do what is best for the woman regardless of what your needs are at that moment.
From a Christian perspective it is this: You are with your woman, and she is looking hot...you kiss her, and you get this funny feeling all over your body, but it is centralized in a certain area: Everything within you, and her looking at you tells you to go for it....BUT...you know that to take it any further would be damaging to her relationship with Christ, and Jesus tells us that it will lead to certain consequences down the road. What do you do? What have you done?
True love would say " Baby...ummmmm, yeah we gotta go. Everything within me wants this: But i know that this is not what you need, not now, but someday". True love always lays down what one wants, and gives what is best. This is what Jesus did. Men, we need to learn this. We need to stop putting pressure on a woman to say " NO", and allow her to be free with us knowing that we will protect their purity before Jesus. Ladies: Only a man that loves Jesus can do this. Be patient, he is out there.

Ladies, in the same way, the bible tells us that a wife must respect her husband. Many ladies come to me and tell me: " I love him"...yes, i am sure you do, but do you respect him???? Is he a respectable guy? Would you be able to share fully what he tells you, does for you, etc??? Or is there some shameful things that he has led you to do that you would not dare share? Do you respect him to the point where you can share openly with your parents everything about your relationship? Do you respect him? Does God respect him?
It is worth the wait for such a person. Men, fall in love first. Find a woman who will is in submission to Jesus. Woman, find a man that you can respect, and who will protect you. I want you to notice that i said find a " Man" or " Woman". This kind of a topic is not for boys and girls, but for Men and Woman. Tomorrow i will tell you the difference between both.

" Father, i pray today for my brothers and sisters who are single at the moment. I pray God that they will not be discouraged, but encouraged in waiting for someone that they love, and respect. God, help them not to settle for anything less: I know that you have intended something for them that they cannot even imagine yet...help them to trust you. Raise up Men who will protect women and their purity. Raise up Men who will respect the woman's body as sacred and fearfully wonderful. Raise up men who can be respected...powerful men who can control their passions until the right moment. Raise up women who will raise the standard...Woman who are worth fighting for. God, only in you can we discover what this looks like...may our eyes turn to you in this moment: In Jesus name we pray...Amen"

Genesis 2:24-25
"A man shall his mother and father and be united to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh".

This passage in the Bible makes something clear...Marriage is for Men, not boys. Marriage is for women, not girls.

I find it funny that many Men want to get married, but they continue to want to live a bachelor lifestyle. They go and hang out with their friends all hours of the night...play X-box or whatever for three hours a day...live with a bunch of guys, Work some low end job, spend whatever little money they have on nothing, etc...but they want to get married. Very few woman i know would be turned on by this kind of a man, and rightfully so. Even though i will be writing more on this topic in full in the next couple of weeks, i will open up with this:

1. A man shall leave his father and mother...
What this means men is that it is time to grow up. I believe that this calling comes on a man when he first begins to seriously think about " SEX". In our culture, we think about sex, then dating, then marriage. The reality is that Sex and marriage should go together in ones thoughts...not dating. The moment that you are starting to think about sex seriously, you are hearing the call of the wild...it is time to get ready and prepare yourself to welcome in a beautiful bride. It is time to leave the confines of Mom and Dad, or bachelor friends...and get a job, and save to get a dwelling place. It is time to stop acting like a kid...time to become a Man. Marriage is for Men, not boys...You want to get married...this is a good thing, Let's get moving. I also love this passage because it shows that it is the man who initiates all this. " A man shall leave..." Man is the initiator, not woman. Women get tired having to try and push the man into action. Ever wonder why women like the bad boys? Bad Boys are passionate...they move, they create. Unfortunately for Christians, we have a lack of passionate testosterone. MEN, GET A FREAKIN MOVE ON...stop putting pressure on woman to have to be the initiators, it is our responsibility.
Proverbs tells us that " he who "FINDS" a wife, has found a good thing, and obtained favor from the Lord". Men, once you move on out...it is time to be united with the one that you love, and if you happen to find that one...the Word of God tells us that it is a good thing...not that you are the good thing...like her savior or something, but that finding " HER" is a good thing. I find men that think that they are God's gift to women...scripture say's otherwise. Women are an amazing gift, and are to be treated as such. We are to always remember the high value of women in scripture, and i will deal with this value in the next blogs. Suffice it to say, Ladies you are precious. Every single one of you. God calls you as a gift to us men. You are to be cherished, admired, held in high esteem. Men, rise up to your calling, live it out, pursue with passion. Stop thinking about Sex apart from marriage. Sex is so sacred that it demands a lifetime commitment from a man for him to experience it's full benefits. Men that sleep around are lacking in that department of satisfaction for themselves, and the women they think they are pleasing ( more on this later also).

2. The second reason for singleness...Ladies, the reason that you may be single still is that you are waiting for boys to hit mental puberty....trust me on this, you want to wait for this to happen. Marriage is for Men, not little boys.
Men, you may be single simply because you enjoy haniging out with little boys who play with toys...your time will come...I hope!

Sorry for such a long post...i commend you married men for your commitments made...continue to pursue with passion. For you, men that are dating...prepare yourself...for you guys that are still playing around....grow up.

So if you are still single ladies...it could be because you are waiting for boys to hit puberty in their heads...guys, if you are still single, it could be because you enjoy hanging out with boys better than women...i hope your time will come!

I love you all, Sabo.

on holiday in ft. lauderdale

I'm sitting in one of the guest rooms at my Aunt's house. My sister's across the hall and I should be sleeping by now. Today was exciting... after hanging out with Carole, my mom, grandma, and Dana yesterday I fell right asleep and got plenty of rest. So the plane wasn't too bad today. We flew into Miami, drove to Ft. Lauderdale, then went to eat. The food was good, service was bad, but we got to come home to homemade cake and Ben & Jerry's ice cream!! We finished the night with a riveting game of Truth or Crap and I lost horribly, so here I am trying to fix my iphoto before bed... with no success. Dink told me to buy at least one thing when I'm out shopping, so I will try to do that tomorrow! LoL. I am so glad we decided to come to Florida... I finally feel like I'm actually on vacation. It's amazing!

new resolutions

1. New Year's resolutions?
make and keep-up a scrapbook of 2007, read my Bible daily, continue writing in my personal journal, read every book in my collection, plan a Spring Break trip to NY or Seattle, refrain from snacking between meals, and write cards and give them out to friends when they have birthdays.

2. Will you be looking for a boyfriend/girlfriend?
I will not be looking. God will bring him when we're both ready.

3. New house?
not unless the whole sorority moves.

4. Will you be looking for a new job?
not new, but I will reapply to the YMCA summer camp and continue working at CYT.

5. What will you do different in 2007?
I will swing dance where ever I want once I turn 21.

6. What will you avoid in 2007?
I will make the conscious effort to have a positive attitude in everything I do AND say.

7. Any trips planned?
I am going to Las Vegas, but I hope to visit NY or Seattle.

8. Wedding plans?
not for me, but I'm hearing about more and more of my friends.

9. What's on your calendar?
school, church, work, birthdays, and sorority events.

10. What can you not wait for?
my 21st birthday in May!

11. What would you like to see happen different?
I would like to see closer relationships with friends and a better attitude throughout the year.

12. What about yourself will you be changing?
I will change as God reveals changes needed.

13. What happened in 2006 that you didn't think would ever happen?
I joined a sorority.

14. Will you tell the one you love how you feel?
I tell my friends and family as much as I can.

15. Will you dress differently this year than you did in 2006?
I'll probably get more clothes.

16. Will you start or quit drinking?
legally, I could start again but I won't.

18. Will you do charity work?
yes.

19. Will you go to bars?
in the spirit of my 21st, I may.

20. Will you be nice to people you don't know?
always.

21. Do you expect 2007 to be a good year for you?
if it's God will.

22. How much did you change from this time last year till now?
a ton... going to church again, stopped drinking after a year of it, moved out of the dorms, and much more.

23. Do you plan on having a child?
in 2007, NO.

24. Will you still be friends with the same people you are friends with now?
hope so.

25. Major lifestyle changes?
not really.

26. Will you be moving?
probably move rooms.

27. What will you make sure doesn't happen in 2007 that happened in 2006?
I will celebrate my birthday in a big way.

28. What are your New Years Eve plans?
not much, relaxing at home.

29. Will you have someone to kiss at midnight?
no.

30. Wish for 2007?
for God to lead every aspect of my life.

life quotes

"Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens" (Jimi Hendrix, American musician).

"We are not human beings on a spiritual journey; we are spiritual beings on a human journey" (Stephen Covey, American leadership expert).

"Don't pray when it rains if you don't pray when the sun shines" (Leroy "Satchel" Paige, American baseball player).

"The fruit of silence is prayer, the fruit of prayer is faith, the fruit of faith is love, the fruit of love is service, the fruit of service is peace" (Mother Teresa, Indian missionary, humanitarian).

"We so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us" (Alexander Graham Bell, American inventor).

"We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us" (E.M Forster, British writer).

"There are only two ways of spreading light - to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it" (Edith Wharton, American writer).

it's an addiction

1. Do you like to shop? Why or why not? yes, & WAY too much!!
2. What was the last thing you purchased? candy for my family's Christmas gifts.
3. Do you prefer shopping online or at an actual store? Why? an actual store, so I can try the products out even if I don't buy them.
4. Did you get an allowance as a child? How much was it? yes, i got about $40 a month & I spent it on food & movies.
5. What was the last thing you regret purchasing? hm.. I like all of the shoes.. & purses.. so, the Mraz poster I bought?
6. Show some of your most recent buys: tickets to see Pursuit of Happyness, scrapbooking materials, a vegetarian meal at Pokez in downtown, a pair of fuzzy brown suede stiletto boots, & several meals at Burger King.

almost twenty and one

1: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4. Write down what it says:
"Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy." - Matthew 5:7

2: Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first?
My pink and brown scarf

3: What is the last thing you watched on TV?
"My Best Friend's Wedding"

4: What is the last film you saw?
Before this, The Pursuit of Happyness

5: With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
The TV

6: When did you last step outside? and what were you doing?
Hours ago, for dinner

7: Before you read this survey, what did you look at?
My old websites from years ago (and deleted them all)

8: What are you wearing?:
Jeans, two shirts, a jacket, socks, and a blanket... It's cold!

9: Do you like to dance?
I love to swing dance

10: Did you dream last night? What about?
Yes, but I haven't a clue what about

11: What is on the walls of your room?
My old room: a tree that I painted; my new one: flowers and birds that the girls before painted

12: Tell me something about you that I don't know:
I usually hate reading but I've started reading the Bible on a regular basis and have a book lined up to read after I finish the one that I am reading right now.

13: If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?
New clothes, I'm sure

14: If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
I doubt that I would change anything because it would probably lead to various outcomes that would be much worse

15: Would you ever consider living abroad?
Yes, most definitely!

things to do

<sup>... in my lifetime:
1. graduate from SDSU
2. go to Disneyworld
3. go to a club in the US
4. get/buy my very own car
5. attend a concert of every genre
6. go to a film festival
7. participate in a food fight
8. visit all 50 states
9. stay in a cabin while it’s snowing outside
10. see the green flash (a flash that appears when the sun rises/sets)
11. go scuba diving in Maui
12. fall in love
13. get married (to the one I love, of course)
14. sing the national anthem for an important sports game
15. sing in a Broadway play
16. appear in a major motion picture
17. have my own television show
18. win a Tony, a Grammy, and/or an Oscar
19. eat at a family-ran authentic restaurant in Italy
20. shop and eat at a cafe in Paris
21. visit Greece
22. go to Norway see the northern lights
23. take a cruise
24. visit every continent (except for maybe Antarctica)
25. fly over fireworks</sup>

<sup>... during this school year:
1. set up plans and submit paperwork for study abroad
2. take the CBEST this semester
3. get better grades than any other college semester
4. make a difference in someone's life
5. show someone something they never knew about themselves
6. make a friend I never thought I'd have
7. spend time with friends that I may not see too often
8. strengthen bonds with my sorority sisters
9. find the best friend that I've been missing
10. continue to make changes to my room and expressing myself
11. smile for an entire day
12. throw a surprise party for someone
13. stay on top of projects and essays
14. finish and turn in every assignment for classes
15. say "YES" to everything for role in Meetings
16. stretch more often and get flexibility back
17. audition for Starlight
18. fall in love (I guess it's more like a dream, but whatev)
19. read my Bible and journal on a regular basis
20. serve my church more
21. help people I don't know when it may be hard
22. go to church AND sunday school each week
23. pray several times every day
24. complete everything on my list
25. continue adding things along the way</sup>

^{_______________________________________}
Goals for today (Tuesday):
_x_ Read essays posted on Blackboard
_x_ Go to classes (ASL, lecture, and presentations)
_x_ Finish laundry
_x_ Begin RWS and Lib S essays
_x_ Write in my journal
_x_ Read in my Bible

Reminders for the week:
Don't eat when not hungry
Set up second EFE
AGO Bible Study tomorrow night
Go to parents' house after Bible Study
Choreograph the Our Gang performance
Missing classes on Thursday
Timed writing on Friday
After Friday classes: work and show
Remember to bring lyrics to work
Pledges' missionary on Saturday @ 10am
Potluck between shows on Saturday
Bring Taming a Liger to Flood Kids
^{_______________________________________}

the portrait of dorian gray

There are so many quotes from the Portrait of Dorian Gray that I just LOVE! I'm sat in suspense trying to finish the book because I simply could not stand the suspense of finishing... Just as I was getting into the story, I came across lines that I just couldn't ignore. Since I was right next to my computer, I wrote it down right away to remember it...
For a while at least.

"[...] women rule the world. I assure you we can't bear mediocrities. We women, as someone says, love with our ears, just as you men love with your eyes, if you ever love at all."
pp. 246

"To get back my youth, I would do anything in the world, except take exercise, get up early, or be respectable. Youth! There is nothing like it."
pp. 269-70

I may open this letter several more times as I retrace the pages for lines that entranced me in my first reading. For now, that will have to do.

♥ Lauren, Pebbles, Pebbz, PB

summer, and then some...

I have a TON of things coming up that I'm extremely excited about! I will be working with the Flood Kids this Sunday morning and I may take over as the teacher after the summer (or so it looks right now). So, I get to work with the first and second graders as the teacher's assistant... I'm assuming, since I haven't heard exact details. This is something that I have been looking forward to doing for a while now and I can't wait to get in there!

One of these things is something that I have already begun. I was cast in the CCT musical, the Sound of Music, as a Novice Nun. We started the rehearsals two weeks ago and we already have a ton of music memorized. The amusing thing to me is that I had never seen the movie until last Sunday. I didn't realize how small my part as a nun was until I saw it but it's cool because I get to start out with less pressure. Now, I just have to make sure that I have everything that we've learned so far memorized! LoL.

I just got the call this morning that I got the job at YMCA Mission Valley. I will be working at the Toby Wells location with the Challenger program (6-7 year olds). I already know that I will be missing their very last week of camp, due to school, but I'm trying to find out if I will be able to join them after my classes on their last day possibly. In preparation for this, I have to take CPR training and get First Aid certified, as well as a Lifeguard certification. I also have three full days Camp Staff training, one of which I can't make all of because it's on Sunday. I won't be getting paid very much hourly but I will be working so much that I will make more with this job than I have any other summer! That's definitely a nice thought. So, I will use this as something to soothe me down from all my uncertainties about being outside, in the water, and playing sports. Have mercy!

The week after the YMCA camp ends (even though I won't be able to be there that last week, due to school), I start rehearsals for My Fair Lady! I will be in the Female Chorus and a Featured Dancer!! I'm actually really excited about doing this show, because I will get the chance to be in the show more and in a show that I like a LOT more! Opening night is October twentieth, so I will be in the middle of school the entire time, but I am going to work hard to ensure good grades for all of my classes.

A week after rehearsals for My fair Lady begin, I will start my Friday classes at SoCo CYT as the Our Gang teacher again. So, I will get to work with the 6 and 7 years olds again, and I can't wait to be able to work on dances and skits with them again. These two hour sessions will only be for ten weeks and I will have a good month to finish up school without any distractions. This is looking like an amazing year!

twentieth

JUST ONE MORE DAY.I am really looking forward to turning twenty years old... finally. As my twentieth year comes to a close, I can't help but feel relieved and anxious. In one sense, I will be able to say that I am no longer a teen. I am finally rid of the "teen" lable of "transition" and "change." A little recap of the teen years: 16: can drive a car. 17: can watch rated-R movies. 18: can be charged as an adult for crimes, but barely legal. 19: not an adult, but no longer "barely legal." Obviously, my life will not drastically change the second I turn twenty, but I have improved many aspects of my life leading up to this new chapter! I am working hard in classes, spending time doing things beneficial to my well-being, attending church again, reconnecting with Christians, performing off and ON stage, and trying my best to approach life with a positive attitude! I am not simply satisfied with the things that have changed in my life, rather I will continue to work hard and be strong enough in my faith to grow closer to God no matter what challenge I face. I hope to show the world the amazing love He has for each and every person of the World by demonstrating it in myself. I will never be perfect but with this foundation that grows stronger each day, I have a great place to start!

♥ Lauren

the girls of ADX

Neophytes: Refounders
Alpha: Doughnut Class
Beta: Peanuts Class
Casey Jean "Schroeder" Pintaric Chan - Advisor
Gamma: Rebels
Delta: Rainbow Class
Epsilon: Sesame Street
Julianne Marie "Elmo" Morper (my great [x6] grand big)
Zeta: Mouseketeers
Eta: Pooh Corner
Theta: Muppets
Iota: Princess Class
Kappa: Flower Class
Kristin Leigh "Apple Blossom" Sauter (my great great grand big)
Lambda: Jamba Juice Class
Mu: Gem class
Melissa Eve "Sunstone" Travis
Kimberly Lynn "Ruby" Moran
Nu: Butterfly Class
Melissa Beth "Olympia Marble" Schwab (my grand big)
Christina Renee "Anise Swallow Tail" Nyberg
Lauren Cathryn "Juniper Hairstreak" Fraracci
Xi: Cookie Class
Dara Jean "Lemon Drop" Keesey
Dana Patricia "Aloha Chip" Conklin
Naomi Leigh "Thin Mint" Wiegand
Omicron: Breakfast Club
Jaqueline Marie "Kix" Lewis
Josie Serafina "Cheerios" Kelley
Heather Kaye "Honeycomb" Despol
Cristal Marie "Cinnamon Toast Crunch" Cicco
Pi: Las Vegas Class
Heather Maureen "Excalibur" Dresch
Emily Kate "Flamingo" Nickerson
Kamar Elyse "Venetian" Chafi
Christa Judith "Mirage" Aldama
Lindsay Mikel "Bellagio" Campbell
Heather Renee "Tropicana" Thornton
Candace Brittany "Luxor" Voget
Rho: Travel Class
Alison Lee "Monaco" Hunter
Sarah Ann Marie "Italy" Leahy (my big sis)
Sigma: Sports Car Class
Ginny Marie "Ferrari" Johnson
Mattie Caitlin "Porsche" Smith
Brittany Marie "Corvette" Clark
Lauren Anne "Mustang" Horwitz
Anna Marie "Maserati" Elder
Esther "Miata" Kim
Megan Margaret Theresa "Eclipse" Garcia
Cynthia Yvette "Jaguar" Hernandez
Melissa Mailan "Mercedes" Ermatinger
Johannah Marie "Avanti" Copeland

this is the next generation

I've been watching Star Trek all day. I love Captain Picard and Lt. La Forge. They're the best! Hee. Alright, that's plenty nerd-talk for now: I realized that I haven't been updating this journal at all over the past month. So much has happened, which is partially the reason there hasn't been time to update. I have been pledging the Christian sorority, Alpha Delta Chi, for a month and a half now.

I love the girls that are a part of the organization and it has changed my life SO much already. I am beyond stoked to see all the great things that come out of this. As of recently, I am the only pledge and I will have to do things without the help of anyone but my big sis, Italy, and my grand big, Olympia Marble. I'm sure I'll be able to get some help from others as I go along, but I don't want to be too dependant on it, so I won't be dissappointed. As for now, I am just getting the memorization done that I still need to do and I am relaxing as much as possible before I go back to the stress of school.

Over the last weekend, I went with my mom to Hollywood, Santa Monica, and La Habra, for the Hart Competition. Music Machine, Sound Unlimited, and Main Attraction were simply amazing. I loved it. It was really nice to just spend some quality time with my mom and now, I'm spending this week hanging out with my dad at home. I hardly get to spend time with my parents anymore, so it's really comforting to get to be with them. Alright, mushy stuff is over and done with. I can't wait for my sister to meet the ADX girls. We might be able to go over to the sorority house tomorrow. Hopefully, I will get myself into gear and make my way over there tonight, even though Dana can't go tonight. I really want to start hanging out with the girls more.
God bless.