Dew soaked spiders web, originally uploaded by MimaD.
Today's that day that I promised myself that I would write about the newfound faith in my life. It has been an interesting couple of weeks, to say the least. And when I look back at my posts, I realize just how "quickly" I went through all the stages of doubt, confusion, hurt, resentment, peace, and renewed sight. Honestly, it's all a bit skewed, since I have a horrible surplus of free time on my hands now-a-days, but it still feel rushed.
Either way, here I am, at a point where I have begun to feel at ease with faith again. The Christian faith, hardly. But I do believe that the values I have learned throughout my years as a Christian have built me to be a more spiritual being. I did not have a healthy relationship with God when I was a Christian and I have many theories about that, but I won't bore with the details.
I am reading A New Kind of Christian and it has provided for me a new hope. My Christian faith was built upon a foundation that was established during my time in the sorority. I built it up using his Word, his laws, my Christian friends, and the values of my church. These are not bad things, but as I became more and more open to the people and the world around me, those foundations began to crumble. My Christian faith could not withstand the blow.
I wrote the above in the San Diego airport, fully intending to share more, however, during the flight, I was unable to put into words the things I have been feeling. So instead, I will simply explain the spiderweb (yeah, get that... my pictures DO have meaning!).
Over time, I hope to reconstruct my faith in a new way. Rather than the one foundational building block, upon which I pile upon my beliefs and practices, I will focus on building a web. A web has not one, but many, anchor points. These points all help to build the foundation for my faith. In the future, I hope that this will give it the flexibility necessary for my faith. If something disrupts the web, the other anchor points can hold it steady, until I am able to rebuild and reconnect the points.
I apologize if that was entirely too vague to satisfy for a post, but I suppose that's what you get when reading blogs that reflect someone's personal life experiences. On that note... I'm in San Francisco and quite excited for the week ahead! :D
The sunset makes the coast look so clear
It's the kind that makes you heart break
But no one has those kind of problems here
And from the sagebrush comes a dove
It comes to take away the ones you love
In camouflage comes a dove, and it comes to take away the ones you love
Wake up you faithless, see your heartbreak gone
The wolf has found a way to lead this foolish flock of sheep astray
And the clouds make fearful noises and slowly turn black and shake
The darkness comes around you
The dark has come to take
And it will cut the life right from you and leave you standing in the rain
With no where left to run to, and no one left to love you but the pain
Wake up you faithless, see your heartbreak gone
It's no use trying to hold on
Wake up you faithless, you won't be here for long
And this shipwreck will soon be gone
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